Notes

I like Zaden still. And Austin. Sarah likes Austin though and she said that he likes her back but whatever. Hannah is mad at me for like no reason. It seriously makes no sense. She's mad at me because on facebook, me and Hannah were talking to Zaden through comments. Well Hannah got in trouble with phones so now we can't have phones in the hall. Well zaden said that its her fault that we can't have phones, and he also said that no one likes her. I agreed with him, about the phones. And I told her that, but she thought I was talking about that no one likes her. 2 of her friends joined the conversation and they were calling me fake and hannah didn't do anything about it. Now she won't talk to me, it doesn't bother me. The only thing that bothers me is that she didn't stick up to me. Like she would have. If someone was doing that to her i would've stuck up for her. but whatever she can fuck off. I have more better friends than her. She stares at me though and it is so fucking annoying. Like fuck, can you not. I have no one to tell this stuff to, so i just do it here. i miss being her friend but then I also don't. She treats me and Sarah Star like shit. She always has, and its so annoying, but whatever . Anyway, i like zaden, and i finally told him. But he begged me all night for nudes. I don't do that stuff anymore, but he just kept begging for one. I would send him one, but 1. he's in my class and it would just be weird and 2. my best friend Kayliana was over. But he still begged for one. In science, I'll look over at him, and he'll be staring at me. I always wonder what he's thinking when he stares at me. Maybe thinking about how ugly i am bc im ugly af. Same thing with Noah Raby, he stares at me in literacy, and i wonder what he's thinking. i kind of like him, but he's dating Kiersten, who i love so much. I don't really know what to do with my life anymore. I just want someone who will treat me right again. Both Austin and Zaden did, but I'll probably never have them again. I'm just hating my life right now. I want to go back to Arizona, away from everyone and everything here in van buren. I just want to leave Arkansas, it can be anywhere, just far away from Arkansas. Ugh im just done with life.