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* Nick: Absolutely magical!
* Squilliam: Absolutely imported.
* Nick: May I?
* Squilliam: Of course. [Nick turns it]
* Nick: Ohhh... Lovely.
* Squilliam: Isn't it?
* Nick: Well, I have to say Squilliam, and I think that I'm speaking for all of our viewers out there when I say this. You, are truly a fancy man.
* Squilliam: Well, of all this gushing perfectly deserved. [Squidward is angry] And now, I'd like to present to you my most favorite room, in the house [Squilliam opens the door, revealing the bathroom] It's all custom. Ah, look at this, it's my jewel-encrusted toilet paper holder.
* Nick: Such class! [Squidward is even more angry, then some houses turn into the title, then cuts to Nick and Squilliam]
* Squilliam: Come, let me show you the roof!
* Nick: An elevator?
* Squilliam: Watch your step. [Squilliam opens the elevator, then they step inside, and press the button that says "Roof"] This may take a while. Just sit back and relax. [water fills some of the elevator]
* Nick: What the!? A whirl pool bath elevator?
* Squilliam: I brought some soap. [Pours out soap. They then get to the roof] All ashore. Welcome, to my roof top garden! Romantic grotto, sparkling berry mineral soda waterfall, and my personal favorite, a 130-foot-long sculpture of my unibrow!
* Nick: It's huge, and... lifelike!
* Squilliam: If you look closely, you'll notice that it's made entirely out of gilded door knobs. [Closes in on the sculpture]
* Nick: You have the fanciest... [phone rings]
* Squilliam: What?
* Nick: You have the fanciest... [phone rings again]
* Squilliam: I have the fanciest ring? [rings again]
* Nick: No, you're phone is ringing.
* Squilliam: Oh. [walks up to phone, and picks it up] Hello? Oh yeah, hang on. [talking to Nick] It's for you.
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