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What I want to say to you.
I think about our relationship about 2 times a day. Just about our memories and fights and just everything. I remember getting angry at you for clueless and stupid things you did all the time. Yes, I did stupid things too and I did things to make you mad. I mean, I did them in spite of you doing your selfish things. Things that I don't understand why you thought it was okay. Or why she thought it was okay. Or why anyone could think it was okay. The drinking and smoking with a group of girls, spending every moment, and staying the night at her house, and just acting like it was okay. Holy crap, you're stupid. So stupid. You made me fall in love with you and then you treated me so bad and acted like I was the bad guy. Yeah, screw you. I was alone. I didn't trust any of my friends with or without you. I was alone. I found out that my dad cheated on my mom by myself. I cried myself to sleep so many nights and I cut so many times and you acted like you didn't know I was hurting. I tried so hard to keep it together. But after a while I couldn't hold it all in anymore. I let it out. I broke up with you because I thought I was doing something wrong. But really, you were the one screwing me over. I loved you, but now I am happy we aren't together. And I know you think about me, too. I know that for a fact. I know you so well. I see it in your eyes as I pass you in the hallway and we make eye contact. I know it. But, it's over and I'm sorry for wasting your time. I am sorry for loving you and trying so hard. I am sorry.
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