Notes

I use writing as a form of therapy so here it is. I feel I am falling back into depression and I don't know why. I've been super lazy, can't sleep at night because I'm alone with my thoughts, and I haven't been wanting to go and do things like swim or go outside. Right now I feel bad because I don't really like anyone in my friend group except for Eloise and sometimes I don't think she likes me. Avery is just kind of annoying, Kinley is super touchy and lies a lot, and Beckett acts like she owns the place and lies about cutting herself and her "mental issues" and "childhood trauma". Kaitlyn is SUPER touchy to the point where I get uncomfortable and is always bragging about trips and home life. She also lies about ADHD and OCD and all of those kinds of things. Eloise is super nice and funny but sometimes when she is with the group she seems super quiet and unhappy. When she is with people like Aureole she COMPLETELY ignores me. Other than that she is definitely my favorite person in the group. I get annoyed by other people in the group SUPER easily to the point where I honestly want to go somewhere else but no one else in the grade I don't really want to sit with. Me and Eloise have talked about moving somewhere else but everyone would just follow us. I sometimes think everything would be better if I didn't care what everyone else thinks but I'm super self conscious about my face and body. I hope I get better and I will probably be back to keep writing.