Notes

Kevin bought two boxes of good Margaux wine, even though he doesn’t drink wine often. The salesperson was very friendly , which made Kevin like him and buy the wine.

Joe Girard, who is known as the best car seller in the world, believes that making the customer feel liked and cared for is the key to success. He shows this by sending a card to his customers every month with a simple message: “I like you.”

The idea of liking bias is easy to understand but we still fall for it. It means that we are more likely to buy from or help someone we like. But what makes someone “likable”? Research shows that we find people nice if they look good, are similar to us, and they like us. This is why ads often have good-looking people and people who look like us.

Salespeople often copy the way potential customers talk, move, and show emotions to make themselves more likable and increase the chance of making a sale. Even if compliments are not sincere, they can make us like someone more.

The idea of selling through personal networks, like Tupperware parties, works because of the liking bias. Even though you can buy cheaper plastic containers in the supermarket, Tupperware makes $2 billion a year. Why? The friends who host the Tupperware parties are very probable.

Charities use the liking bias very well. Their ads mostly use pictures of happy children or women. You will never see a serious, injured fighter in their ads, even though he also needs your help. Animal charities also carefully choose who is in their ads. Have you ever seen a brochure from the World Wildlife Fund with spiders, worms, algae, or bacteria? They might be just as in danger as pandas, gorillas, koalas, and seals—and even more important for the environment. But we don’t feel anything for them. The bone skipper fly is gone? Too bad.

Politicians are very good at using the liking bias. Depending on who they are talking to, they talk about different things, like where they live, their background, or money issues. And they make us feel good: Every person who can vote is made to feel like they are a very important part of the team: “Your vote counts!” Of course your vote counts, but only a very, very small amount, almost not at all.

A friend who sells oil pumps told me how he once made a very big deal for a pipeline in Russia. “Did you bribe them?” I asked. He shook his head. “We were talking, and we found out that we both love sailing. From that moment on, he liked me; I was a friend. So the deal was done. Being friendly works better than bribery.”