Notes

therapy talk:

i go into a protective mode when i am around my dad.i know that my dad would never hurt me, and i know that he loves me but my feeling are very sensitive around him.and i feel and i feel like i am drowning in my emotions and i feel like i cant move or talk whenever something happens it just gets worse and i cant talk to anyone about it except for my mom and my grandma i feel like safe and secure but i feel none of those things when i'm around him or other public places or with my family but this is only on occasions when i don't take my med's or i don't take them at the right time but i have been getting on a better sleep schedule and taking my med's a the right time and i feel like my old self again and its great!sometimes i feel like everything bad in my life has come from moving to North Carolina. my friends betrayed me and my dog died and i feel like there's a hole in my chest that can never be filled, i cant sleep when i'm supposed to,i am going to camp this summer but Annie says she doesn't want to go but i need someone there that i know and trust,my cousin Robin goes some to help my aunt deb make food for camp, but she never stays.we are moving to Michigan so i might not even go to camp but i sure want to i feel bad because i'm happy happy were leaving but my hole family is sad my dad lost his job so that's why we have to move were going to Michigan to figure some things out it could take years months weeks days, my dad has applied to many jobs all over the world so now its just a waiting game this whole process is gonna take a long time and its going to be very stressful and overwhelming for everyone but i have faith that god will take care of us and all of this is leading up to something big part of me is scared and part of me is excited to see god use me i know that he will take care of me and my family and all i need is him and them.