Notes

So what you do is you don’t kill them. You roofie them, and take them into your basement, right? Then you surgically cut off their legs so that they can’t walk, but don’t bleed out, right? Then what you do, is you feed them their legs over the course of a couple of days. And you make sure they know that they are eating their own flesh. Like, especially if they have tattoos, show them the tattoo before you cook it. All this time you have them bound to a chair, or a bed if you’re feeling generous. Now, after a few days, you might be running out of leg meat, so, depending on how charitable you’re feeling, you give them an opportunity to end their misery. What you do, is you sit them on the floor, and you give them an empty revolver. You show the poor blighter the bullet and start to walk away. You watch as they crawl and stumble and break into tears as they try to chase you. Then, you throw them the bullet. Little do they know, it’s a blank. The look on their face when they finally think that it might be over is astonishing. Then you leave them to starve. I think my favourite part of the whole process is how their screams die out near the end. The realise the inevitability of it all, and calm down. Have you ever had a conversation with someone as they notice that they’re dying? It’s beautiful.