Notes

This year is probably one of the worst Christmas. I mean last year was really bad too even though my dad was there. I feel bad, I meet him grateful, but it was a really bad time with him. He was on his Nintendo all the time playing Fortnite. I just wanted to hang out with him because that's what he was there for. But no he was just playing the whole time even though he can do that at home. Since all he does is work. I mean he does have stuff to do but he can do that at home when he gets there. At least he could have spent some more time with me before he had to go.

This year I don't feel as excited and I feel like I'm losing my spark slowly. I can't really do anything this is just how I feel and I'm not gonna pretend I don't feel that way and I'm not gonna fake smiling like my friend tells me to do. And I hate when people tell me to stop crying or they try to comfort me to stop crying I want to keep crying I need to cry I just hope this Christmas ends up better than I think and I get some nice presents and I wish I could have bought but my mom presents and my dad but I'm probably just gonna make something get it later. I hope 2025 is a good year Emily out.