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I hate you. I hate every goddamn thing in this whole fucking place but I hate you the most. You have no idea how close I am to ending it. I was so ready to take every fucking pill in this house and lock myself in the bathroom. You think i'm mad because of my kindle or junior guards but they're just the icing on the cake. I don't think you understand how severe it is, both my anger and my mental illnesses. You can go to hell. I can't decide who I hate more, you or me, but no matter how much of a horrible person I am at least I will never be as horrific as you. You are the bane of my existence, sometimes I would rather go into foster care than live with you. At least in foster care the wouldn't give two fucks about me, where you try to mold me into someone i'm not, someone I will never be. I can't believe you have the nerve to say you love me, you monster. Oh and Shelly, I know you will read this because I have no privacy and just about as much rights as a pig. Just so you know, I am a living human being with emotions and a brain and (surprisingly) a heart, not just some object that you own and can do whatever you want with. Also the primary reason I tried to kill myself so many times was because of you, you're the reason I want to die. Your the reason I can't wait to get to college (if I live that long); to escape you.
You are worse than i'll ever be. You are a monster.
     
 
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