Notes

[ Rap Task ; current time ] ❀
Eminem- Mockingbird!

Sepulangnya dari kelas rap, Tatiana langsung pulang menuju dorm. Melangkahkan tungkainya dengan langkah penuh semangat.

Sesampainya didalam kamar, Tatiana melempar tasnya ke atas ranjang dan segera mengambil sebuah buku. Didalamnya terdapat banyak lirik lagu-lagu berbasis rap.

"Here we go," bersiap-siap mengerjakan tugas dari Miss Bella.

"Ehem..Huft~" Inhale exhale. Menarik nafas dalam dan menghembuskannya berulang kali. Setelah tadi didalam kelas mencoba menyanyikan Rap God dan tentu saja kewalahan, Tatiana mendapat nasihat untuk mengatur pernafasannya lebih baik lagi dan berlatih lebih giat.

Dengan posisi mendekap bantal diatas ranjang, Tatiana menyalakan sebuah aplikasi karaoke. Ia siap merekam suaranya.

Eminem- Mockingbird

Sebuah catatan didalam bukunya, sejujurnya, ia belum menghapal seluruh lirik yang ada didalam sana. Ugh, itu sulit.
“Hm~Hm~” 🎶 Sang dara bersenandung kecil dan menekan tombol play. Senandung yang tengah ia lakukan berhenti begitu saja.

RECORD
Alunan nada bersarat emosi membuat sang dara menutup kedua matanya, tepat saat memasuki beatvTatiana mengeluarkan suaranya.
🎤 Vis ; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBOxNEXrjS0
🎼 “Yeah~”
Sang dara membuka kedua mata, mulai menatap deretan kalimat dalam bukunya. Tubuh dan kepalanya ikut bergoyang mengikuti irama. Perlahan, Tatiana mulai bernyanyi mengikuti ketukan dengan irama yang santai.

“I know sometimes~ things may not~ always make sense to you right now—“ 🎶 Mencoba menghayati sedang berbicara kepada seorang gadis kecil melalui suara yang pelan nyaris berbisik namun masih memiliki nada didalamnya.

“But hey! what daddy always tell you?—“
“Straighten up little soldier—“
“Stiffen up that upper lip—“
“What you crying about?—“ 🎶
“You got me.—“ Tersenyum menyeringai memastikan bahwa si ‘anak’ tidak sendirian.
Tatiana menarik nafas dalam dan melanjutkan setelah melewati satu ketukan.
“Hailie, I know you miss your mom~ and I know you miss your dad—“ Menghayati bagaimana melanturkan kalimat pada seorang gadis kecil melalui rap, bahwa ia tahu bahwa orang itu merindukan kedua orang tuanya.
“When I'm gone but I'm trying to give you the life that I never had—“
“I can see you're sad, even when you smile, even when you laugh,” menarik nafas cepat berekspresi sendu seolah tahu apa yang sedang terjadi pada gadis itu.
“I can see it in your eyes, deep inside you want to cry—“
“—cause you're scared, I ain't there?” memasang ekspresi bertanya tanpa menarik nafas dan melanjutkan liriknya.
“Daddy's with you in your prayers—“
“No more crying, wipe them tears—“
“Daddy's here, no more nightmares—“
Merendahkan sedikit nadanya pada bagian ini. “We gon' pull together through it, we gon' do it--
Lainie Uncle's crazy, ain't he?—“
“Yeah, but he loves you girl and you better know it—“ 🎶
Tatiana menarik nafas cepat dan kembali melanjutkan liriknya, masih mengikuti irama dan ketukan dengan nyaman. Dara bersurai pendek itu mengangkat sebelah tangannya menaik turunkan mengikuti beat.
🎶 “We're all we got in this world—“
“When it spins, when it swirls—“
“When it whirls, when it twirls—“
“Two little beautiful girls—“

🎶 “Lookin' puzzled, in a daze—“
“I know it's confusing you—“
“Daddy's always on the move, mamma's always on the news—I try to keep you sheltered from it but somehow it seems. —The harder that I try to do that, the more it backfires on me.”
Melafalkan lirik lebih cepat.

🎶 “All the things growing up as daddy, that he had to see—“
“Daddy don't want you to see but you see just as much as he did.”
“We did not plan it to be this way, your mother and me—“
“But things have got so bad between us—“
“I don't see us ever being together ever again—“
“Like we used to be when we was teenagers—But then of course everything always happens for a reason—“

🎶 “I guess it was never meant to be—But it's just something we have no control over and that's what destiny is—“
“But no more worries, rest your head and go to sleep—“
“Maybe one day we'll wake up and this will all just be a dream—“ Mengembungkan pipinya sejenak, hampir mati kehabisan nafas. Memasuki bagian chorus Tatiana sedikit rileks dan bernyanyi penuh penghayatan sembari menutup kedua matanya.
🎶 “Now hush little baby, don't you cry—“
“Everything's gonna be alright—“
“Stiffen that upper lip up, little lady, I told ya—“
“Daddy's here to hold ya through the night—I know mommy's not here right now and we don't know why—“
“We feel how we feel inside—“
“It may seem a little crazy, pretty baby—“
“But I promise mama's gon' be alright—“

Ia berusaha menghayati bagaimana mengelakkan pahitnya kenyataan hidup dari anaknya..
Tatiana kembali bernyanyi dan melakukan rap, mengikuti gaya dasar Eminem, namun tetap ada sentuhan ‘Tatiana’ disana.

“Ha!”
“It's funny.” Mengangkat sebelah bahunya.

🎶 “I remember back one year when daddy had no money—Mommy wrapped the Christmas presents up—And stuck 'em under the tree and said some of 'em were from me—“
“ 'Cause daddy couldn't buy 'em—I'll never forget that Christmas I sat up the whole night crying—“
“ 'Cause daddy felt like a bum, see daddy had a job—“
“But his job was to keep the food on the table for you and mom—“
“And at the time every house that we lived in—“
“Either kept getting broken into and robbed—“
“Or shot up on the block~ and your mom~ was saving money for you in a jar—“
“Tryna start a piggy bank for you so you could go to college—“
“Almost had a thousand dollars 'til someone broke in and stole it—“
“And I know it hurt so bad it broke your mamma's heart—“

🎶 “And it seemed like everything was just startin' to fall apart—“
“Mom and dad was arguin' a lot so momma moved back—On the Chalmers in the flat one bedroom apartment—“
“And dad moved back to the other side of 8 Mile on Novara—“

🎶 “And that's when daddy went to California with his CD and met Dr. Dre—“
“And flew you and momma out to see me—“
“But daddy had to work, you and momma had to leave me—Then you started seeing daddy on the T.V. and momma didn't like it—“
“And you and Lainnie were too young to understand it—“
“Papa was a rollin' stone, momma developed a habit—And it all happened too fast for either one of us to grab it—“
“I'm just sorry you were there and had to witness it first hand—“
“ 'Cause all I ever wanted to do was just make you proud—“
🎶 “Now I'm sitting in this empty house, just reminiscing—“
“Lookin' at your baby pictures, it just trips me out—“
“To see how much you both have grown, it's almost like you're sisters now—“

🎶 “Wow, I guess you pretty much are and daddy's still here—“
“Lainnie I'm talkin' to you too, daddy's still here—“
“I like the sound of that, yeah—“
“It's got a ring to it don't it? —“
“Shh, mama's only gone for the moment—“

Kembali memasuki chorus, sang dara menutup kedua matanya, mulai lelah.
🎶 “Now hush little baby, don't you cry~~”
“Everything's gonna be alright—“
“Stiffen that upper lip up, little lady, I told ya—“
“Daddy's here to hold ya through the night—“
“I know mommy's not here right now and we don't know why—“
“We feel how we feel inside—“
“It may seem a little crazy, pretty baby—“
“But I promise mama's gon' be alright—“

Entah kenapa hatinya berdenyut saat menyanyikan part ini.
🎶 “And if you ask me to~”
“Daddy's gonna buy you a mockingbird~~~~”
“I'mma give you the world~~”
“I'mma buy a diamond ring for you~~”
“I'mma sing for you~”
🎶 “I'll do anything for you to see you smile~”
“And if that mockingbird don't sing and that ring don't shine~”
“I'mma break that birdie's neck~”
“I'll go back to the jeweler who sold it to ya~”
“And make him eat every carat don't fuck with dad. Ha ha!~”
Tatiana menghebuskan nafas membayangkan rela melakukan segala hal hanya untuk melihat anaknya tersenyum..
Padahal dia belum menikah. Lol

‘STOP’. Record—save. Selesai!
Tatiana berguling diatas ranjang dan menelungkup, menopang tubuhnya dengan kedua siku dan mengetik sesuatu di dalam ponselnya.

Send record to : Miss Bella via Email.
Here my task. Thanks, miss! ❀

Tatiana Jessamine Choi.