Notes

Verse 1
There’s not enough drugs in the world to wipe my frickin’ past away
But it feels like it was just yesterday
When I found out my mom passed away
So much I still have to say
But I passed up on my only shot
Should have showed you that ‘I love you’
But I was too busy smoking pot
Too busy starting fights, and arguments and breaking rules
Hanging out with the wrong group of people, because I thought it made me cool
But now I know I was a fool
Sorry for being such a jerk
And now you’re dead and I can’t take any of it back and it makes it so much worse
And I just want to be able wake up in the morning and pretend it doesn’t hurt
On the day you died, I wondered why the hell you had to go to work
Because if you didn’t, you would still be alive
I’d be able to sleep at night
Why the hell would God take you from this planet and leave me behind
You love me? Vince, Monica, Stacey and my damn brother
It bothers me knowing my children are never gonna meet their grandmother
I just want to cry
Actually I want to die
Cause the day you passed away I bottled it all up inside
A couple days ago was Mothers Day
But you weren’t here to celebrate
They say that when you die, you always make it to a better place
That may be true, but without you I don’t know how I’ll make it through
You always said you loved me,
But I never said the same to you


Verse 2
And now I lay awake and reminisce everything that you did for me
If God is real, then how can any of this crap be meant to be?
I love you so much, now I’ll never gonna be able to tell you that
Just to see your face again, I’ll go through frickin’ hell and back
But I know you never coming back
I wish I had my mother back
You’re the only reason that I’m breathing, only reason that I want to rap
Everybody want to be able to hold me back and try to keep me on the ground
They say that God is real, and I keep looking but he’s not around
Ain’t nobody ever gonna be able to save me, I can’t save my frickin’ myself
Need some major help
Cuz I don’t want to burn inside the flames of hell
Everything you do in life, is gotta be for something right
Think I need to go to bed and deal with the pain another night
I don’t even want to write
But I gotta be able to cope with the pain.
So I say to hell with a broken heart, I got a broken brain
I just want to walk away
But I still got a lot to say
But I feel like I’m better off dead, or put in jail and locked away