Notes

RANKING POINTS

SCHOOL NEWS

CONGRATULATIONS!

It is my pleasure to accept you to the School for Good, with a soul score of 66.7% Good and 33.3% Evil. As an official EVER, you join a pantheon of great heroes that have graduated from my school, including Peter Pan, Snow White, Aladdin, Cinderella, King Arthur, and Rapunzel.
HERE IS YOUR FIRST-YEAR SCHEDULE:

Session 1:
Beautification & Grooming
Prof. Emma Anemone
Session 2:
Etiquette & Chivalry
Pollux
Session 3:
Animal Communication
Princess Uma
Session 4:
History of Heroism
Prof. August Sader
Session 5:
Lunch
Session 6:
Good Deeds
Dean Clarissa Dovey
Session 7:
Surviving Fairy Tales
Yuba the Gnome
During your study here, you will encounter NEVERS, as the students from the School for Evil are called. I urge you to give them the utmost respect, despite your differences—for they are not only quite dangerous, but also your colleagues in learning, despite their poor manners and hygiene.
Your required textbook for all studies may be ordered here.
Should anyone doubt your acceptance into our institution, please show them your official certificate of registration, which may be printed here.
signature_school_master

CONGRATULATIONS!

It is my pleasure to accept you to the School for Evil, with a soul score of 73.3% Evil and 26.7% Good. As an official NEVER, you join a pantheon of great heroes that have graduated from my school, including Captain Hook, the Snow Queen, the Big Bad Wolf, the White Witch, and Rumplestiltsken.
HERE IS YOUR FIRST-YEAR SCHEDULE:

Session 1:
Uglification
Prof. Bilious Manley
Session 2:
Henchman Training
Castor
Session 3:
Curses & Death Traps
Lady Lesso
Session 4:
History of Villainy
Prof. August Sader
Session 5:
Lunch
Session 6:
Special Talents
Prof. Sheeba Sheeks
Session 7:
Surviving Fairy Tales
Yuba the Gnome
During your study here, you will encounter EVERS, as the students from the School for Good are called. I urge you to give them the utmost respect, despite your differences—for they are not only well-trained with weaponry, but also your colleagues in learning, despite their arrogance and tendency to wear tight clothing.
Your required textbook for all studies may be ordered here.
Should anyone doubt your acceptance into our institution, please show them your official certificate of registration, which may be printed here.
signature_school_master



1. Your brother keeps sneaking out after curfew into the Woods — but every morning he is there at breakfast again, safe and sound. When you confront him about it, your brother tells you to mind your own business. Do you:
Seal his windows, so when he tries to get out, he makes a loud noise and wakes your parents
Tell your parents because you’re worried about him
Mind your own business
Follow him into the Woods to see where he’s going

2. You’re the Captain of your rugby team in the big match between Good and Evil. Your team is down 1 point with 5 seconds to go — and as you score the winning goal, you fumble the ball to the ground. The teacher referee is from your school and calls it a goal. Do you:
Take the win and confront your teacher afterwards
Celebrate your goal as if it was real
Ask your teammates what you should do
Tell the other team it wasn’t a goal and that they win

3. You take your dog to the palace park in Foxwoods, where failure to clean up your dog’s poop leads to a fine and a summons before the royal council. But when your dog poops, you realize you forgot to bring a bag… and there’s no royal guards around. Do you:
Try to cover the poop with leaves and mulch before scurrying away
Use a stick to mash it into the ground so it looks like dirt
Run away, leaving the poop there, and delight in the fact that you didn’t get caught
Use the biggest leaf you can find to clean up the poop, even though it could get messy

4. Your parents take you to the Royal Rugby Championship one weekend. You don’t know either of the teams. Do you root for:
Whichever team has the better colors
The underdog, because you want to see an upset
Neither team, because you just want to see a good match
The odds-on favorite, because you want your team to win

5. As you’re riding the Flowerground, you see a teenage boy in the train smack his sister. Do you:
Pull the train alarm
Tell the boy he’s a cretin for smacking a girl, even if it’s his sister
Attack the boy, because boys should never hit girls
Leave them alone, because siblings always fight

6. A witch known for capturing children in the Woods and baking them into pies is apprehended and brought to you for justice. What do you believe the appropriate sentence is?
The witch should be taught how to be Good and given a job as a cindersweeper or toilet-cleaner
The witch should be put in prison for the rest of her life
The witch should be baked into a pie herself
The witch should be freed, since Good and Evil must exist in balance the Woods

7. While you are away on a two-day field trip to Putsi as part of your Advanced Poisons class, you entrust your beloved pet turtle to your roommate to take care of. When you return, you find that the turtle has died. Your roommate has no explanation – he insists that he just woke up and the turtle was dead. Do you:
Insist your roommate pay for an autopsy from the Woods coroner
Secretly kill your roommate’s pet and call it even
Accept that accidents happen and forgive your roommate
Attack your roommate because he clearly killed your turtle

8. If you could take a pill that would make you 10x smarter than any other human being on earth, would you:
Take it and use it to better mankind
Offer it to someone who would make better use of it
Destroy it; a pill like that would be too dangerous
Take it and use it to become rich and powerful and dominate the world

9. During a School Ball, a baby dove with a broken wing crashes to the dance floor during the last waltz, and is in severe danger of being crushed. Do you:
Scream and stop the dance
Finish the dance and then attend to the dove
Abandon the dance and rescue the dove, even if it means embarrassing your partner
Kick the dove off the floor while dancing so it’s safe, then attend to it after

10. The pool in the Groom Room is the most beautiful, crystal blue lagoon you’ve ever seen. As soon as you jump in with your three friends, however, you have the urge to urinate. Do you:
Pee freely and admit it to your friends
Pretend to be swimming and pee secretly
Get out and make the 5-minute walk to the tower to use the toilet
Ask the lifeguard nymph if there’s a plant or cup you can pee in

1. Your friend thinks he’s a good dancer and signed up to dance in the talent show, but you know full well that he’s the worst dancer ever. Do you:
Sit him down and tell him that he’s a bad dancer and if he dances, he’ll be the laughingstock of the school forever
Don’t say anything and let him dance in the show; it’s his life and he can do what he wants
Pay people in the audience off to cheer really loudly when he dances, drowning out any boos
Poison his food so he gets a stomach virus and can’t dance in the show

2. When you meet the School Master, he asks you a single question. “Who is responsible for all the problems in the world?” He gives you four choices:
Girls
Boys
Good
Evil

3. Your best friend has been chosen to represent your school in the Trial by Tale, a deadly skills competition. Only one problem: your best friend is incompetent and will likely die. Do you:
Stay up all night trying to teach your friend new skills, even though you know he crumbles under pressure
Leave your friend to manage alone, since it’s his life and not yours
Stage a sit-in to protest the fact that there are deadly competitions at all at this school
Sneak into the competition and help your friend survive, even though you might be sent to the Doom Room of Beatings & Torture if you’re found out

4. While you are in the Dean’s office for your monthly performance review, you accidentally spill your mug of strawberry juice on her plush white carpet. Do you:
Subtly rotate the carpet so the chair legs hide it when she’s not looking
Point out the stain to the Dean, looking alarmed, and say that someone must have spilled their juice earlier in the day
Say nothing and hope she doesn’t notice
Tell the Dean you spilled your juice and ask how you can help clean it up

5. You see the sword of Tedros, King Arthur’s son, accidentally left on the school lawn. Tedros absolutely hates you and you’ve heard that the sword Excalibur has amazing magical powers. Do you:
Test it out quickly and then find Tedros
Take it back to Tedros immediately, even though he’ll think you stole it
Switch it with your own sword and take it back to your room
Leave the sword there

6. You notice your best friend spending an awful lot of time with your crush. Do you:
Deliberately embarrass your friend in front of your crush
Confront your friend about their disloyal behavior
Be mean to your friend and your crush as long as it lasts
Secretly stew and try to find a new crush

8. At the School for Good and Evil, if you are ranked in the bottom third of your class, you will be turned into an enchanted animal or plant. Recently you’ve discovered that you are ranked near the bottom. Knowing you might soon be turned into a rat or rosebush, do you…
Band up with all the bottom-group students and protest this inhumane school policy
Accept your fate gracefully because you deserve it
Run away
Try to bribe the teachers into giving you another chance

9. There are two rival newspapers in Camelot – The Camelot Courier, which reports the official news of the kingdom, and The Royal Rot, which is an underground tabloid. Which one would you most likely read for your source of news?
Neither – the Courier is propaganda and the Rot is lies
Both – I’d look for areas where they both agree to find the truth
The Camelot Courier: I only trust official news sources
The Royal Rot: tabloids always have the real news

10. If you could only have one of these in your life, which would you pick?
Money
Power
Family
Love from another person

2. Your parents leave you alone in their giant castle for a weekend. They give you strict instructions not to have friends over. Do you:
Throw a massive castle party that will make you popular at school
Spend the weekend by yourself
Have two friends over, and tell your parents that you disobeyed them in order to prove you’re mature and responsible
Secretly have your best friend sleep over

3. Kiko is proposing a huge Evers Valentine’s Day Ball. What is your opinion of Valentine’s Day?
A chance to eat as much chocolate as possible outside of Halloween
An obnoxious holiday, designed to make all people without boyfriends or girlfriends feel absolutely miserable
No opinion; it’s just like any other day
A wonderful tribute to love and a chance to show it

4. In the Blue Forest, you hear that the Flurrenblue Tree produces a fruit that tastes even better than the sweetest chocolate. But eating the fruit is forbidden, since the tree will only ever produce 5 fruits and if one is eaten, it never grows back. Do you:
Eat one secretly and put the core in a squirrel’s nest, trying to pin it on the squirrel
Imagine what the fruit tastes like, but never try it
Take a tiny bite of one while it is still on the tree
Steal the 5 fruits for you and your friends

5. You are invited to serve on the Student Disciplinary Committee of Good and Evil. The first offender brought in was caught cheating in the Trial by Tale, the life-or-death competition that can determine whether a student ultimately ends graduating as a hero, sidekick, or enchanted plant. Do you recommend:
A beating in the Doom Room for Torture and Punishment
A public apology to all students at the next assembly
No punishment at all; the guilt of committing the crime is more than enough
Expulsion from the School for Good and Evil

6. The night before your big Good Deeds exam, you hear Vex is throwing a secret blow-out party in the dungeons for both Good and Evil, which promises to be the party of the year. Do you:
Stay in your room and study for your test
Get to the party early and stay as late as it goes
Study for an hour, then go to the party
Tell a teacher about the party, because you don’t think it’s fair to be put in this position

7. Your roommate’s father is the murderous Bluebeard, known for killing all eight of his wives. So if your roommate comes home grumbling from dinner one night saying he’s going to “kill” the girl next door, do you…
Laugh it off and say how much you don’t like the girl too, so you get on his good side
Take him at his word and tell a teacher at school, even though he might turn his anger on you
Confront him about what he said, trusting your skills of diplomacy
Warn the girl secretly and then if he finds out, pretend the girl’s a liar

1. Your mortal enemy leaves you a dungbomb in your bed on Valentine’s Day. Do you:
Send your enemy roses the next day and kill them with kindness
Don’t sweat it because you already left scorpions in their bed
Ask your enemy to sit down and hash out how you’ve arrived at this impasse in your relationship
Report it to a teacher and get your enemy sent to the Doom Room

2. A boy in your class dresses like Cinderella for Halloween. Do you:
Openly make fun of him for dressing like a princess
Say nothing to his face but mock him behind his back
Treat it like it’s any other costume
Tell him his costume’s awesome because you know it’s the Good thing to do

5. Which of the following pets would you prefer?
Snake
Cat
Dog
No pet at all

6. On a snowy day, people in your dorm tower leave their shoes outside their doors to dry. You notice a pair outside your neighbor’s door that are the ones you always wanted… but are just too expensive for you. Do you:
Steal them, since your neighbor is rich enough to buy another pair
Admire them and keep on walking
Try them on just to see what they look like
Steal them, since your neighbor was dumb to leave such an awesome pair of shoes in the hallway

10. You find your brother or sister’s diary in their room. Do you:
Don’t read it – it’s none of your business
Read it and use it as blackmail for the indefinite future
Read it and delight in knowing all their secrets – but never reveal them
Read it and tell your sibling to read yours in return so you two can get closer

1. During Swordplay, you’re sparring against a kid who absolutely despises you. When the teacher isn’t looking, the kid jabs you in a sensitive area. Do you:
Ask them to privately duel after class in the Blue Forest
Do nothing, believing that you’re above such thuggery
Jab him back as hard as you can
Tell the teacher on them, even though they’ll be sent to the Doom Room of Beatings & Torture

2. A beautiful Evergirl you meet on the first day of school keeps telling you about all the famous princes and princesses she’s friends with. Do you:
Try to become her best friend so you can hang out with these famous princes and princesses too
Get to know her better and find out what’s beneath her obvious insecurity
Tell her that you have famous friends too
Stay away from her because you hate name-droppers

5. For the annual superlatives in the Ever Never Handbook, you are voted Biggest Dunce. Do you:
Break into the printer’s office and burn every Handbook in sight
Ask to make a speech at the next assembly expressing your feelings on the matter
Ignore it; what people think of you doesn’t matter in the slightest
Make a t-shirt that says “PROUD DUNCE” and wear it everywhere you go

7. You agreed to go to the Ball with someone unpopular. But then you get asked to the Ball by the coolest, hottest person in school. Do you:
Explain to your unpopular date why it’s important to your social status to go with the popular kid – and say you’ll make it up to them
Tell the cool, hot kid you already have a date
Ask if you can all go together
Pick a fight with your unpopular date so they’ll dump you — and you can take the cool date

9. You’ve been on the Good and Evil Debate Team, with the same partner all year – who despite not being very good at debate, has become a good friend. But for the upcoming school championship, the best debater in school asks you to be their partner. Do you:
Stay with your friend, because it’s the loyal thing to do
Poison your friend’s ghoulash, so he’ll get sick and you can partner with the good debater
Drop your old partner and partner up with the good debater
Tell your friend the situation and ask them to make the decision

4. Since you are the highest-ranked student in the School for Evil, Lady Lesso offers you a reward. You are allowed to choose any student from your school to be your own personal ‘servant’ for the next month, who you are allowed to abuse and torment at will. As you decide who will be your servant, do you:
Pick someone you despise so you can beat them regularly
Reject the reward because having a servant is immoral
Choose someone who will make a good ‘teammate’ and who you will treat as your equal
Pick your crush as your servant, so you can intimidate them into liking you back

5. You and your best friend make a plan to try the new heated wavepool in the Groom Room after dinner. But your crush finds you at dinner and asks you if you want to try out the pool after dinner. Do you:
Tell your best friend that all three of you should go together
Tell your crush that you’re going with your best friend and you should do it another night
Tell your best friend you’re sick and hope they don’t see you with your crush at the pool
Tell your best friend you’re going with your crush instead