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I've read your letter.
I appreciate you for being honest and help me to lift the burden on my shoulders and head by writing your thoughts there.
I hope you understand the reason why I did that thing to you.
It's because I wanted to be sincere in helping you to lift the pain by persuading this, despite my growing feelings to you.
I've been hurt by you, for many times. But again, I was being sincere in helping you, dan kamu nggak lihat itu.
Even when you only saw me as your only little sister, I did accept it and I put my desire to be yours aside.
Disayang seperti adik pun saya ngga masalah, kok. Apalagi itu pendekatan.
Tapi sadar nggak, saya di sini juga menderita? Bukan, bukan karena penolakan yang saya dapat, tapi cercaan yang saya dapat dari kamu karena saya menutupi semuanya dan kamu ngecap saya PEMBOHONG.
Saya memang menutupi karena saya takut kamu marah, dan di situ saya juga serba salah.
I also tried to talk to you through my Revy account, lewat sini juga, tapi nggak ada tanggapan sama kamu.
I do admit, you're selfish, but what can I do? I only accept your decision and I have nothing to do with it.
Bahkan saya rela reputasi saya sebagai Kitana hancur karena masalah ini, dan project Rosemary yang nggak kunjung selesai karena saya tunda terus.
Even my own friend, Jean, said that I was dumb.
Banyak dampak yang saya dapatkan dari masalah ini, dan kebanyakan adalah negatif.
Ini alasan kenapa saya tiba-tiba keluarkan kemarahan saya seperti itu, karena apa? Saya difitnah, dikiranya saya jelek-jelekkan kamu when the fact I am not.
Intinya, thank you for everything and I am sorry.
I just want to be friends with you in the future, sekarang saya butuh recover dengan keluar dari LTHR.
Mungkin bulan depan, atau kapan, saya bisa kembali ke sana as a different person.
And one thing, don't harm yourself by drinking too much, perhatikan juga dampaknya di masa depan kalau kamu sering konsumsi alkohol.
And I also hope you can be mature as well.
Thank you, have a good day.
(Kitana/Rebecca Andriana Chou)
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