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Look I know what I said was unforgivable and I regret it very much. I cant believe I said that, I cant believe my mouth just opened and said that. I swear I am crying right now and my tears don't fall for no reason. I made a mistake that's unforgiveable but I'm sorry. I cant bear watching my friends...forget friends, I cant bear watching my sister's with sadness, It just kills me. It hurts to see you like this. I don't know what made me say that, If you don't want to talk to me or be my friend that's fine...I don't want to force you...but at least listen to my words. Everyone makes mistakes and so do I. I'm so sorry...I cant forgive myself right now and yet I'm hoping you forgive me. What am I thinking? I cant believe I said that. How stupid of me. My ears are so hard to hold back and yet they fall. I don't like seeing others upset...I don't like seeing you upset. Every time I hurt some ones feelings I feel like I just hurt my own. You can hate me...You can be angry at me...You can want to kill me, but I would never mean to say anything like that to you. Right now I broke your heart and because of that mine is also broken. I cry as I write what I am telling you and thinking about the mistake I made. I'm sorry I swear, I didn't mean to say that to you. I just want you to hear me out I didn't mean it... I'm pathetic piece of shit and I promise you I didn't mean what I said. I cant believe I said that... I'm so fucked up. I guess its because I'm not used to having friends. I haven't had friends for 8 years and since secondary I have tried to make good friends and right now I cant even keep one. I cant trust anyone the way I trust you and someone else. I trust you more than I trust my sister. I just want you to hear my words...I don't expect you to reply to me. I am sorry...I guess I cant keep friends, all I can do is loose them and let them hate me. There is no point of me being sad when that wont help me at all. Some one once told me ''The way of the tears is the way to comfort. Sigh my friend so you can rest and make emotional supplications in private. The universe will encompass your voice and by the will of Allah all wounds would heal.''
     
 
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