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I am truly sorry that I had to leave like this. I am also sorry you had to see me like this. This was not because of anyone. It is not because people bullied me, because I have not really been bullied for a long time now. I just could not take it anymore. Here is a re-cap. I have been depressed for about 5 years now.. I have been suicidal for 2 to 3 years now.. I have known for a while who I truly am, and what I truly believe. I have just been to afraid to admit it. The emptiness I feel I just unbearable. Though I know from here I either go straight down or open the door to nothingness. I feel I may deserve it. No longer will I search for the approval -I do not deserve- from others that I will never get. There are so many people here that I truly adore. But there is just too many bright lights too cast a shadow. This life is demanding, I am afraid to walk the world alone. Only certain people will know the references I make in this. They are some of those bright lights. Nothing you could say could have stopped me form going home. Je t'aime mon cheri. And with that hopefully, death finally swept me away.
This has been my Famous Last Words, Love,
Cassidy Nicole Lawrence
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