Notes

expectations vs reality - [email protected]
we will talk about:
presentation part | ppt making job | review meeting chutiyapa | running around for data | delegation myth | designation chutiyapa | girl impressing myth | friend's call on salary myth | CTC myth | innovation myth


Ganesh enters a hall -HR speaks and welcomes all the new managment trainees
"you guys are the creme la creme of the nation. the world is proud of your intelligence and you're at the best place to test your talent. welcome to JS Carter Bank. we have a .... "
there is a sweet smile of pride in the face of Ganesh.

next day, he's delegating a task to four team members and explaining things. everybody in the end appreciates ganesh for his charm and intelligence. they say they see a future business leader in ganesh. a fresh aroma of confidence on Ganesh

the other day, he is presenting to some of the seniors at the office. he's talking some big strategy stuff with a smart presentation and he comes up with 3 key solutions. everybody appreciates ganesh for his smartness. they unanimously say " Ganesh, you're the future of this bank. you made us proud"

another day, he's in a room called "Digital innovation center" - he's discussing with few colleagues and seniors about the new product to be launched in the market - with slides and board markers. a perfect smart job.

when he comes out of the meeting, girls in the coffee point discuss - 'hey, look, he's Ganesh... the hottest and smartest guy in our company. all our bosses are impressed by his intelligence. and he's cute. i so wish to date him once..."

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horn of alarm and he wakes up !!!
with a beautiful dream - he gazes out of window - enjoys the fresh sunlight .. and receives a call from mom
mom: Ganesh, good luck beta for your new job ... today is the joining ??
ganesh: thanks ma! it's tomorrow.. am really excited about this new job ....
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ganesh receives a mail from HR - IT
: Dear Ganesh,
please find the details of your official mail id as provided to you from HR:
USERNAME: firstname.lastname
PASSWORD: (first3letters)(last2letters) (to be changed within 1st day of your joining)
e.g. if your name is Pratik Shah, username = pratik.shah , password = prash
... ganesh thinks about that..
my username= ganesh.dubey
password = gandu !!!! wtf !!
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6 months later . . .
amit 2 ganesh: ganesh, give me an analysis on the latest campaign launch
siddhart 2 ganesh: ganesh, what happened to the procurement order for the developer?
pratik 2 ganesh: ganesh, do this analysis of the MIS reported this month .. send me soon
pratibha 2 ganesh: ganesh, coordinate with dhiraj on digital marketing stuff .. let me know if you need any help..
ganesh gone mad! - thinking that he's a slave to all the people

next he is collecting data for analysis...
ganesh 2 sharma: sir, i need some data about the MIS of digiplus app
sharma2ganesh: sorry boss, i don't have. please ask priya ... she may have the data
priya2ganesh: sorry ganesh, mere pass nahi hai.... business intelligence wale hi data de sakte hain
business intelligence2 ganesh: no ganesh, you can contact IT for the data
IT2ganesh: this will take 2 days of time as it'll involve lots of coding... please get the approval of your dept head
& dept head is always missing !!
ganesh gone nuts!!

next he is in a presentation ..
senior boss to junior boss: pankaj, what is that data ... have we done 1900 crores of loan business this fiscal ?? i am skeptical about this data ... who's given that
junior boss to ganesh: ganesh, what is this!
ganesh: sorry sir, it is actually 190 crores.. by mistake it is 1900..
junior boss: by mistake!! you're a mgt trainee...should be ashamed of errors
ganesh: sir, it's just a mistake..i'm sorry for that.. i won't do it again
senior boss: wtf is this! i hate these youngsters... always saying sorry...but they will always repeat the mistake...
.. the meeting gets highly aggressive... they slap ganesh and pull off his hair...
ganesh feels... ganda kat gaya!

next day, he has to meet Mr. Sunil Talwani - head of strategic innovation division
ganesh2sunil - sir, i want some information on the latest product launch
sunil - k, am forwarding you this BCG ppt - go thru dat - i'll get back 2 u on dat later
ganesh- k thanks for that... i have a query.. i came to know that there is no facility for data storage in the device... everything will move to a server.. but in case there is no connectivity, how will the app data be stored
sunil- see bro, it;s all based on some logic - our consultants have already thought on that - CEO has given a go ahead - as in we can take this call for next phase
ganesh - sir, but just for curiosity, we can design something ....
sunil - abey ! tu apna KRA pe focus kar gandu ! kaahe ko ungli karta hai ... consultants ko paise diye hain ... jyada dimaag lagani nai.... u go thru this ppt... if u have queries..call gauri ..she'll explain
he looks back at designation board - Head of strategic innovation division

next day, he sees prerna..his crush at the cafetaria
ganesh: hi prerna
prerna: hey...how r u...
ganesh: am good ...
prerna: really ? heard..tumhari kaafi le rakhi hai ..
ganesh: haan , thoda bohot..but chalta rehta hai... how'z ur project
prerna: all good... going to singapore for client visit ....
suna hai u're the new dog in the dept .... just kidding .... sab teri lete rehte hain ...
ganesh: taqdeer ne le rakhi hai, to sabko maze de raha hu
prerna: chal..i got a call.... tu data analysis kar :P :P :P .... tera pappu ho gaya beta :P
.... ganesh gets frustrated like hell ....

then he's going through Dadar road with a huge crowd in a market locality.... the music starts...ganesh is walking with a cigarette in hand..with the music.... he's at his room.... washes his face at the washing machine...looking at himself...trying to understand himself....

next frame he is standing at a cross road - and he speaks to himself:
"jeevan mein asli udaaan baki hai
hamare iraaadon ka imtehaan abhi baki hai
abhi to naapi hai bas mutthi bhar zameen
abhi to saaara aasmaaan baki hai"
... extreme ways plays.... and it fades.....