Notes

ok elijah i know this is kinda random but i need to say it again to make myself feel better or just get it off my chest or something, please dont answer the questions im assking in this beacause it will just make me feel even more like shit. how do you go from bein too immature for a relationship to just wanting sex with some girl? i was right here and i said i would do whatever you wanted and would listen but you just insisted you werent ready for anything. but at the same time you were just snapping alyssa because you wanted to fuck her. i was trying everything i could to make you want me and the only thing you wanted was a fuck buddy. then i was hesitant because i said no to stuff and you texted kaylynn and asked her to do stuff with you maybe. then you were trying to act as if i was more important but why did it take you so long to figure that out. you chose alyssa over me when you decided to go have a quick fuck rather then even try to start something with me someone who actually cares about you. then i said i didnt want to do stuff with you and you asked kaylynn if she wanted to. then yoou claimed you didnt know id feel bad about stuff like that. i know you were smart enough to know ut though, i just didnt want to elieve you actually didnt care about me at all. then you claimed that you would stop talking to kaylynn because i was more important to you then her. while you sontinued to snap her about it rather than talk to me. i have the snap and you were saying that i thought you were rebounding from kaylynn to me or vice versua, but thats litterally what you were trying to fucking do elijah. its was like you just didnt care about me at all. then you wanted to all of a sudden start talking about how it was nice to have someone like you and only you. well welijah i wouldnt have fucking known about anything like that beacause up until the time we started dating you never gave me that privilege. there was always soeone else this entire time you would rather talk to or be with. hell even when our relationship began you still rather had talked to alysia more then me and i had to hear about it all the fucking time as if it was just another thing. i had to constantly hear about how hot you were and how you and alysia always had a connection but it wasnt going to effect my relationship so i ddint have to worry. you tell me we have a pretty normal realtionship but no we dont elijah. a normal first relationship i shoudnt have to deal with the fact that youve fucked three girls before me. and i dont veen care about cady or emma most the time. its the fact that you chose alyssa fucking hooper over me then claimed you never went around saying stuff about what yall did while fucking but alysia told me and i told you i believed you but elijah its hard to believe her when she went into such detail and told me shit that you would definetley say. its like you were proud you ditched me and treated me like an actual piece of shit.. im going to be honset woth you elijah, if i wouldve known that you had done that to me i wouldnt be in a relationship with you right now because you were such a terrible person and treated me like i was another girl who just liked you even though i know i put enough effort in to show you i actually cared and you knew it but you didnt care because you didnt want tdate ypu wated free rein were you could go around and just fuck whoever came along and i will always hate you for that elijah and i know it was before me and that was stuff that happened before you and you know that but this alyssa shit didnt happen before me it happend during me wether you care to admit that or not.