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Sometimes, when we don't have boundaries, it doesn't make sense to give our qualities up for free like that.
You don't want to restart or duplicate patterns just for the sake of having a relationship.
Need: I think I need acknowledgement. This is how you determine who has time and energy for you. There are people who need to be educated about you. You should be validated.
They may need you there, because they don't know how to do this for themselves. You can become a utility.
Doesn't encourage extending pain threshold.
I cut myself off a lot. If you're doing something in school, you're doing it in other locations. Maybe college made worse something you've already been doing all along.
Humanity is the only objective place we can relate. Everything else is subjective.
What does it mean for that group to have you? Not just what you get from them.
Power & Control. It's learned. European clients. A lot people can't think about power issues - this has been normalized for them. White men don't have context or language to understand a dysfunctional childhood.
What makes us powerful? How is power conveyed in our upbringing? A transition of power? Physically, financially, etc...
Feeling powerful?
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