Notes

Seven habits of highly effective people
-lead ur life in an effective way
-acheave goals
-knowlege what to do (skill)
-how to do it
-want to do it(desire)
-to be rather than to seem
- tip of iceburg
- visualise the maturity continium
-dependence
-indepencence
-interdependence
1. Be proactive
2. Begin with the end in mind
3. Put First Things First
4.Think Win-Win
5.Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood
6. Synergize
7.Sharpen the Saw
principals
natural laws of affectivenes
the actual reality of what happends
u cant fake habits
we control our own actions
principals lead to concequences of those actions
the situations change (teaching sth) but principals stay the same
align habits actions with principals
paradime
the way we see the world
paradime can change if u have a new piece of information
we see the world as we are not as it is
our reality
the story of the kids and their mother
shift of paradime
feelings = alitude
actions, behaviour
the quickest way to change a persons behaviour is to change their paradime

the gouse and the golden egg
affectivness high level
-getting what u want
-ppc
-getting what u want again and again
neglecting production
capability
goose dies
marrige
businees
how well does the relationship with the stake holders
see in the long run
increase economy well and quallity of all stake holders
domino effect if u neglect

relationships
emotional bank account
trust
social capital
trust level becomes larger emotional account becomes richer
small mistakes
withdraws - negative actions
deposits
understand each other
promise
dont break promises
be kind
little things are big things
clarifiying expectatons
withraw violating expectations
roles and goals
be loyal to thew absent
dont be two faced its like trying to walk west and east at the same time
give feedback in an i message not a u message
afficciencu is innafective
slow is fast
fast is slow

patience and persuation
ill give u this if u give me that violation of a relationship
softness , respect , showing love in every possible way , appropraite ways to give feedback, they know what u think of them deep down, patience is the essence of faight hope
deposits
appolofice sencerly + dont cover up + manipulative appologies dont work
forgive (unintentional or intentional) cause not forgiving is more painful than the offence
dont keep things
allow people to change
give more chances
forgive and forget

HABIT 1
be proactive
life is a product of values not feelings
decisons not conditions
u take the eniciative to do what u want with ur life
dont be reactive
i am not what others want me to be i am not what the past has made me
habit of awareness that i am a sepparate person from my moods
take responsibiity
be proactive
compacity to do things based on principals
proactive develops ectra ordinary capability
we have the power to choose our own victory
the last of the human freedom
power to choose anything that happens to u
highest value is to choose alititute in situations u have no control over
between what happens to us and our respons to it lies our freedom of choice and in that freedom lies growt
exercising your will
freedom is a condition of the person
we dont have control over our liberty
but the more we control our freeedom it will expend our liberty
what helped people to survive in death camps
a vision of the future
a work yet to do
mans search for meaning
the situations we can affect and cant influence
imagine two circles
the circle of concearn
thing u can do nth about
the sercle od influence
things u have control over
focus on the inner circle
work for an organisation a half president where the president was too controling
benn was proactive and smiled about the president so his circle of influence got larger
how he things, whats his opinion , the president started asking
always work on the circle of influence
use it to motivate yourself
focus on the things u can do sth about
what do u love when u dont love
love the verb
life is a value to be actualised
love is sth u do
start thinking seflessly
love first, dont wait to be loved
love forgiving love forgetting is a verb
first verb than feel
indivisuals begin to get a sense of responsibility
act upon our concerns

Habit 2
Begin with the end in mind
personal lidership
sense of vision
self chosen values
applyes to everything
habit one sais u are the programer
habit 2 sais write the program
u decide it
u take lidership in your life
dont let life just happen
test of our meaning
life is always created twice
1 - mind spirit
2- phisical creation
messyre twice cut once
make sure the blueprint is really what u want
how usefull is the end in mind when doing a jiqso puzzle
everything we do in our life
this is my vision of life
every other decision is inluenced by the end
what are the things that are trully important
focus on a vission of the future that is greater than baggage from the past
development of a personal purpose statment and a family mission statment
1. vission - mental picture about what u go about
2. principals - how u go about it
write down whats improtant to u so u create ur mission statement
give yourself time to cultivate the purpose
u uncovere you mission , what r ur unique gifts, what contributions are important to u
a good solder who served his country and loved his family
mission statements shall be timeless
write it as if if it will never be changed
it should do with both ends and means
it should do with all four of our needs
to live
to learn
to love
to leave a legacy
mission statements shall deal with all of the roles of ur life
-create a nurturing place of faight order truth love happiness and relaxation
*dont rush mission statement
*dont announce them
*dont ignore them (act upon them)
long term thinking/planning/ivisioning

Habit 3
Put first things first
1- be proactive be aware u are the programer
2- begin with the end in mind - write the program
3- put first things first - run the program
dont put first things seconds
things witch matter moast should never be at the level of things wich matter least
second habit decides what first things are
keep ur life interated
walk your talk
managment principal
u organise and execute around the things u put first in habit two
people in relationships are first things
u manage ur time it drives u to afficenci
when approach doesnt work u try to do it better
sth to do for the day
drop ur gf
he calls her up
nice social part
get to the hard part
we just be friends
she was very upset
he had to go to her house
dissruption of his skeduule
u turn people into a thing
u want affectivenes with people
and afficiency with people
first things in life are relationships
be open and humble
get into that new map and paradime thats bassed on relationships not scedulles
a compus and then the clock
write r the most important things to u
family, health , education , finance , friends
answer 2 q
think of an activitie that would produce marvelous resaults - clean up after myself quadrant 1
one activitie in ur work and professional life that would produce marvelouse resoults - study constantly quadra2
we shift to a new paradime
a way of thinking up on relationships
time menagement maitnance
importance - within u , ur value sistem, ur mission,
urgency - enviroment , social value sistem
decide what is trully imporant in your life
1 important and urgent problems or crices
2 is not urgent but important (prevention ,preparation , planning)
3 not importrant but urgent (other people expectations)
4 not urgent or important (phone calls , papers )
neglect quadrants 3 and 4
littely say no
to do quadrant 2 and 1 say no to 3 and 4
what is important to another person is important to u if the person is important to u
six step process
squedulling tool (planner)
1 - connect to mission (connect to ur vission to ur life)
2 - study roled u got in your life (with relations)
3 - select goals around the roles
4 - organise weekly (its small enough to have a sense of perspective of what the big thigs are)
5 - adapt on a daily basis of ur principals , what comes ur schedulling is very soft but hard principals
6 - evaluate, stand back and reflect on whats happening
u relax cause ur organised and everything u have is schedulled and ballanced
u opperate on an overall mission on a sence of principals
ull never know the power of that until u really do it

Habit 4
Think win-win
Hearth of all relationships
habit of mutual sharing
people are treathend of people
if they share knowlage and power they have less
they dont belive in win win
u eighter win or lose
dont go for lose win
people dont care if they lose as long as the other people lose too
win lose aproache ends up as lose lose
getting even is not important
the pie gets larger and larger
u tap into more creativity, wisdom , inteligense
new insides new alternitives
im gonna go for win win with people
win win can be seen as weekness and softness
u lost they won
win win is tuffer is much tuffer than win lose
not give in not give up
sometimes its not practical
u go for win win or no deal
be open and honest
u just say " i want up both to win"
green and clean story
let me show u what green looks like
let me show u what clean means
how would u do it , u boss yourself
he did nothing
dont clean it up
raise boys not grass
how our you going?
its so hard
what was hard he hadnt done one single thing
sacks that make him vomit
takes time to set up agreement
keep beliving in the people in the way agreed
win win elements
1 visual picture of desired resaults - be patient
2 teach people guide lines (teach no no - things not allowed )
3 identify the resourses
4 set up the accauatibly agreement
5 identify the conciquences (good or bad)
if the relationship is good people will be twice as harsh on themselfs as ud be
mutual benifit

Habit 5
Seek first to understand than to be understood
Do want to be understood ?
dont reply, understand
to feel understood is to be loved
first be influenced than have influence
be open to them
u understood them so they understand u
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