Notes

every "I love you" that I say means that I accept you for the person that you are and that I don't wish to change you into someone else. it means that I don't expect perfection from you; just like you don't expect it from me. it means that I'll love you and stand by you even through the worst of times. it means loving you when you're in a bad mood and too tired to do the things I want to do. it means loving you when you're not feeling well, not just when we're doing fun things and enjoying our time. every "I love you" means that I know your deepest secrets if you're comfortable with telling me them, and that it is a promise that I will never judge you for them, asking in return that you don't judge me for mine. it means that I care enough to fight for what we have and the relationship we have built together, and that I love you enough to not let go. it means that I think of you, I dream of you, I need you, want you and know that you feel the same way for me. there are obviously more feelings that come with those words, but some things are just harder to put into words.
you have to realise that what you bring to our relationship is different. it's unique and it's very, very rare. i didn't fall in love with you because i felt lonely or bored. i fell in love with you because after getting to know you, i knew i didn't need anybody else but you. you make me feel so confident and strong, yet so vulnerable and humble at the same time. and the sheer thought of losing you gives me anxiety. i can't explain how much hate and fear that thought gives me. you are everything i've ever wanted even though i've never spoken about it. when i look at you, your eyes melt me. no language has enough words to describe the feeling i get when i'm in your presence. you understand me. there is no other way to say it. when i am emotional, or moody or generally a mess, you manage to take care of me and calm me down. you make me feel safe and you make me feel more relaxed and loved when im stressed. you take care of me. you bring out the best in me, Doğan. and by that, i don't mean you make me more mature, or have better manners, or whatever else is considered best in this world. i mean that you make me want to do crazier things, you make me want to have fun and act inappropriately with you... you make me want to take risks and pursue my dreams with integrity and passion. around you i finally started living better. every word that falls from your lips stays stuck in my head. and when you look at me and smile the very core of me begins to melt. i adore you. im obsessed with you, to the point of madness. i hope we'll last forever. i want your last name, i want your phone calls and your voice to be the first thing i listen to every morning. i love you so much, i really do. it means more than just enjoying being around you, it means that i get butterflies in my stomach every time i see you. it means that i want to be in your arms forever and that i wish i could just pause time when im with you, so we stay together forever. i want to be there for you when you're going through a tough moment and i want to be with you whenever you need someone to stick by your side. i need you in my life, and i think i always will. i just need you to let me love you as much as possible. let me there for you when you need it. let me hold you when i can and let me cuddle with you. let me live every second of every day i have with you like it's my last. i love you forever and always. no one else could ever take my heart the way you did. you're my everything. you're my whole world and my happiness. at the beginning, i tried to resist letting these feelings overpower me. i was afraid of getting too close to someone and letting my heart get broken again. for some reason you made me feel safe being vulnerable. you made me feel like it was okay to love you. even though i wanted to let myself go and trust completely, i wanted to make sure that my heart would be safe with you. please understand how i felt and protect it with all your love. the moment i looked in your eyes before i kissed you i knew i would be safe with you, and that's where it would stay forever. thank you for finding me and making me yours, i promise that with me you will always feel at home. i will make sure you always feel how much i love you with every touch and kiss. until i see you again, just know you are always in my heart, thats where i will keep you close to me until the day we never have to part. thank you for loving me, doğan.