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Okay so actually i got a feeling of wanting to rent about him while we were chatting with my gf about school and stuff. So what i told my partner was that i always felt special when i was in his classes, he made me feel loved, he felt like an actual father to me bc i never got any of my fathers love in my childhood, even the therapist told me. I felt like i was the teacher's pet bc everytime my classmates wanted smth they asked me to say it bc i never feared to ask him about anything and when I asked we always got that, idk how he felt about me, probably just like another student but oh well, i really felt comfortable around him and thats very rare of me feeling comfy around men. So i may didnt made him feel like we have a father-daughter relationship but to me, he was a father figure. I felt so loved by him, i felt special, once in my life, the first time in my life i felt appreciated and loved. I actually hate how close he got to me bc i know ill probably never speak to him again what is just so depressing to me, i didnt even thought about it that deeply, but when i will ik i will just crash and break down crying for like 1-2 hours. OK so i started to text my gf and just stopped writing but i think its all done, i had said i needed to say. Thanks for everything Mister, i will never forget you, im really grateful for everything<3
sincerely, Leaf who you knew as "Szandi":)
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