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Have you ever been stopped by fear - concern with conflict, fear of taking risks or fear of failure? The problem is, it is innate for a lot of and holds them back from doing what must be done to get more clients and create a life and business of these dreams. We are all naturally hardwired a particular way. This hardwiring impacts how exactly we communicate, how exactly we behave, and how we give and receive information. You can find both strengths and limitations together with your hardwiring. For some people, fear of conflict and risk are part of their natural hardwiring that could be hurting their business if left unmanaged.
The easiest method to describe how your hardwiring can be the underlying cause of your fear is to learn about it through Hazel's eyes.
There once was a business owner named Hazel. Hazel shied away from conflict in her life. She didn't realize it, but she worked in fear: concern with conflict and from taking chances. more info says, "I'm afraid or concerned that or that may happen" and spends lots of time consumed in what others will think or say and concerned about all the things that could go wrong.
Hazel lives in "what if," and tries to eliminate all barriers before taking action. She carefully weighs risks, and often delays decisions or takes no action because she's talked herself from it. She is effective in a team environment primarily because that team gives her security and safety she innately needs. She seeks consensus from the team especially if you can find risky decisions.
Part of Hazel's natural hardwiring is her need to remove or retreat from conflict. In fact, when folks are in disagreement or disagreeing with her, she will not say anything. In those situations, she walks away often with incorrect perceptions because she wants to avoid the argument. Her employees are left with unresolved feelings that only build-up over time.
What To Do
What's underneath Hazel's fear is, partly, her natural hardwiring in order to avoid conflict in addition to a fear of taking risks. This hardwiring, if left unmanaged fosters a world of unresolved conflict, prevents her from going big with her message, and ultimately hurts her business. She often walks from conversations because she doesn't think it would accomplish anything to debate a predicament anyway. Since debating ideas, results in as conflict, and that type of interaction is naturally draining on her behalf, she really wants to avoid it.
If you feel your blood circulation pressure rise, that person turning red as well as your first instinct is to turn off and run at the first sign of what you view as conflict, you might have a little bit of Hazel in you.
So how do you handle that conflict and risk taking if you are naturally wired to avoid it?
1. Take a deep breath. If you're wired this way so when under stressful situations, your breathing shallows placing pressure on the body. A deep breath offers you a second to get some perspective and gather your ideas.
2. Clarify Assumptions. In situations where there is conflict, your instinct would be to shut down and leave without clarifying your assumptions. Spend more time learning why the individual feels or thinks they way they do concerning the situation by asking clarifying questions. Clarifying questions are open ended that require a response. They begin with words like what, who, where, when, and how.
When you are delaying decisions, maybe the outcome of your decision feels risky to you. In that situation, you need to consider what you can gain versus what you will give up when making decisions. Individuals who naturally desire to avoid risk often will look at what they need to give up (time, money, etc.) versus what they will gain. For those who are naturally wired in order to avoid risk, worries rises up because they are going into unknown territory and that is unsettling in their mind. Identifying what you can gain helps to balance your assumptions.
3. Focus on the issue or Situation Not on the People or the Personal. Resist getting into the blame game or concentrating on who's right or wrong. Once you focus on the problem or process that's evoking the issue, it focuses the energy in developing constructive solutions.
4. Identify a Plan and Timelines. Individuals who are naturally wired to avoid conflict or risk may never implement a remedy because they are fearful that the answer may create more conflict or not work out. Give yourself a time limitation to think through the next steps. Jot down the steps creating a arrange for yourself. Identify timelines on your own and stick to them. This gives individuals who are risk averse to create a tangible plan so the solution becomes more real (or known.)
5. Recognize That You May Gravitate Toward What you Know. Because what you learned or everything you know, you might stay where you are because it is comfortable and less risky than something new. This causes these entrepreneurs never to implement or spend money on those new things that very well could generate more business, more clients or bring their business to a new level. Simply recognizing this behavior will let you understand why you may well be resisting a new idea or solution.
Interacting with Hazel
If you interact with someone like Hazel, understand that she has an innate ability to be considered a team player but may be regarded as not saying what's on her mind, particularly if she believes there might be conflict with something she says. She might not feel secure enough in the situation to talk about her ideas. If you connect to someone like Hazel acknowledge her contributions and consider her ideas lacking any immediate comeback, which she'll see as debate. Instead, consider her contributions thoughtfully watching for tone and pace in your conversation.
As a small business owner, should you be naturally hardwired in order to avoid conflict or risk (as risk is often seen as a conflict in order to avoid), it can stop your small business from growing, if left unmanaged. Remember to create awareness about your natural hardwiring and implement these simple ways to manage it. Once you make the investment in you to ultimately grow personally, you will see the investment grow your business exponentially.
Lisa Mininni is best-selling author of Me, Myself, and just why? The Tips for Navigating Change and President of Excellerate Associates, home of the Entrepreneurial Edge System. Lisa is really a sought-after business coach particularly because of her unique systems method of building a sustainable business. For your free eBook Get Ready, Get Set, Go! 3 Steps to Jump Start Your SET UP, visit
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