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I don't want to stay up so late either but alone late at night is such a relaxing feeling sometimes, and with all of the shit on my mind I really need a break sometimes. I feel like giving up every single day of my life and its so unfair, I have to find comfort in these fictional characters because I rarely ever get affection so I have to IMAGINE it. When I close my eyes I feel so alone and lost, so get away from me and stay out of my fucking business. If I stay up longer then its my business and my problem, so get the fuck away and let me feel okay for once. I'm so scared and I'm so, so tired of it. I'm improving on my own time so LET ME FUCKING IMPROVE. STOP LOOKING AT ME AND WHISPERING ABOUT ME LIKE I'M SOME WORTHLESS DISAPPOINTMENT. IT HURTS, IT HURTS AND ITS A FIGHT TO EVEN GET THE MOTIVATION TO GET UP IN THE MORNING WHEN I KNOW THAT NOTHING HAS CHANGED.

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