Notes

ayoko na pls, i have to deal all my anxiety and pannic attacks for him pero i never got the same love i gave him he never loved me back he made me the third wheel of their relationship and i gladly accepted it and he also made me their daughther pa HAHHAHAHHA pero the problem here is why can i be the only daughther can i be the only one? and he told me *ur the only princess of mine* then its been a month after he said that and now i have a sibling in our roleplay he lied, and now im dealing to be a shadow child naging shadow child na din ako in my real family and how it hurts na they never understand u and even cares about you they always put theirself first when theres a fought you tried to deny all the negativities their saying about me i kept denying and i was fighting for myself and i tried to not cry but in the end i was the weak one i got blame in things i never did it really hurts para sakin and i dont know if nararamadaman ba nila yung feelings ko kasi ang sakit na i always hide my tears i always breakdown at night and pretend nothing happen kasi if i did ill be called as a overreacting girl that never did something important it reallly hurts talaga na im trying my hard to make everyone proud of me but nothings happens my roleplay dad was supposed to support my emontional issues i mean he did helped me not dying but he used himself and it still did not help me from doing a suicide i never do suicide because i been scared to die i always think of dying but i never did in a certain way because i dont want them to be lonely but i think its time they never needed me anyways im tired of hiding everything i cant even explain it properly its just like i dont wanna live anymore im done with this world its always has been me im always the problem.. i have to pretend everything had been good but it never did im tired of hiding what i felt.. i always think of dying na talaga and sana naman someone will care for me at my furneral this would be my last note bye.