Notes

My short story
my story is going to be about a time in my life where i was low but i worked hard to overcome it...
it all started about 5 years ago i had never thought in my whole life i would ever touch any crazy things like (drugs) it was very hard for me because i grew up with a family that used drugs or drank alcohol. it came to me one day that i'd try smoking for the first time and then from there i started getting heavy on it then i thought i'd try something harder then smoking i started using hard drugs and got very addicted to them it got me to make various mistakes and i started getting in trouble with the law and it made me start hanging out with people i thought were there for me just because they were providing me with the substances i never thought id end up like some of my family members but in that moment i felt i was unstopable it was hard for me to stop i kept doing it i was never really home i was always out and about the sad part is i started all this when i was 11 and ever scince then i always faked my age around older people just to get the stuff i wanted like drinking and drugs. i was going through alot at such a young age like loosing family members family splitting up and my parents barely ever there to take care of me. i've been taking care of my little siblings for a long time and i was stressed at such a young age .I was always going home late at night i was berly ever home and if i was i was always high or drunk or barely there for a shorts amount of time ,those times i would go home my family would asked me if i was ok and i wouldn't like that they didn't exccept me for who i was before that and after that i got pushed away even more it made me feel unwanted that's why i would use just to get out of my head and not feel any emotions. i tired getting help i even had a P.O at one point in my life just to keep me clean i even had to wear ankle monitors so i wouldn't go anywhere but id still leave and get in trouble get in car crashes i honestly didn't realize i was hurting myself and my family it took a lot for me to finally understand i was honestly not doing good for myself at all and that my health was getting worse and worse everyday! I look back at it and think i could've lost my life in those situations but i was always under the influence i thought it was just us having fun it kind of sucks how these things work like i ask myself what drove me to use?? why did it make me feel like it was making life feel better? i wasn't exploring the emotions i should be as a human being now that i'm learning its hard for me to not think about that stuff but i'm slowly over coming that urge to use and i know i can get better and be the change for myself and for my family. that's why i came here to peak baheavioral center now im getting better and learning ways to understand my feeling and emotions without using substances and i'm proud of myself i'm already a month in and now i have 2 more months to go and i know i can do it and end the substances use and the cravings in myself. it was very hard for me to even say that before but that's how i know i'm getting the help i need when i can tell myself i can do it and i can be the change for myself and my family.