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so i dont know i how i feel rn .theres nun wrong but there's nun good neither. i don't want to die but i can't keep living like this.i alwasy think my baby girls mad at me hahah dont tell her i called her my baby girl she don't like it. but like i really love her and i am js scared i am goanna lose her again....uk she doesn't like herself but every part of her is js perfuct uk i js dont know how to help her. i wanna help her as much as i can but i can't. i cant see her ,i cant touch her . all i can do is words and say stuff uk she dont always belive me and irdk how to help cuz like normally i help by physical touch but i cant do that i am not a really good girlfriend she can be telling her feelings and my dumbass just says OK or haha ya like wtf is wrong w mw i js dont understand me any more i wanna love her and i do but i js dont know how to tho. i can barly show my feeling . i wanna be there for her and help her throw everything and be by herside but uk my dumbass cant do that bc i dont know how i am trying to be better. i am really trying uk i wanna be the perfuct girlfriend ok i really do but my feeling are not doing what my body whants it to . my feeling wanna be w her and be a good girlfriend.... all ik how to be is a girl ok i am not met for this but i really love her tho and ik she loves me to but...irdk anymore ok i wanna be the one shes gose to when she needs someone. see i really want to but like irdk if i should bc if i do sum wrong she will leave but if i do sum to late she might leave then UMFG! i cant do this shit right can i .....i dont wanna give up on us tho .....i love her w all i got left uk. i wanna give her a good non toxic relashonship but idk how all ik is toxic i have been hurt so many times i js dont know ok .....maybe its bc i am from a broken home? maybe i fight bc i dont know where i belong?

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