Notes

I HATE MY BODY. I HATE EVERYTHING, MY FACE,TEETH,HAIR,HANDS BASICLLY EVRYWHERE. I FEEL LIKE IM USELESS AND IM ALWAYS THE PROBLEM. PEOPLE HATE ME, I HATE THE WAY I ACT, I MOSTLY HATE MY SMILE AND I FEEL LIKE IM OVER WAIT. SOMEONE TOLD ME I WAS BEING GREEDY BECS I ATE AN APPLE RIGHT BEFORE LUNCH. I ALWAYS TRY AND BE NICE TO PEOPLE BUT I FEEL LIKE I DONT AND I FEEL WHEN I TALK ABOUT MY PROBLEMS I MAKE IT ALL ABOUT MYSELF AND I FEEL LIKE NO ON ACTAULLY TRUSTS ME. MY EX BESTFRIEND LEFT ME AND EVER SINCE I FEEL LONELY. IM NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR ANYONE, MY COUSIN WAS THE ONLY PERSON I TRUSTED BUT I FEEL LIKE SHES DRIFTING AWAY AND EVERYTHING I TELL HER GOES STRAIGHT TO HER BESTFRIEND EVEN THO SHE SAYS IM HER BESTFRIEND BUT IK FOR A FACT IM NOT. WE DONT EVEN SEE EACHOTHER MUCH AND WHEN WE DO SHE TALKS ABOUT HER BESTFRIEND. MY FRIENDS AWAYS SAY BETRAYED THEM OR LEFT THEM BECS I HANG OUT WITH DIFFERENT PEOPLE BECAUSE THEY KEEP BEING RUDE AND MEANTIONING THINGS THEY KNOW I HATE. I SELF........... AND ONLY MY BROTHERS GF KNOWS SHES HELPS ME ALOT SHE IS SO KIND TO ME BUT SOMETIMES I THINK I GET QUITE ANNOYING ASKING TO WALK TO SCHOOL WITH HER AND ASKING FOR ADVICE OR HELP. I FEEL LIKE IM ANNOYING ALL THE TIME. MY STEPMOM HATES AND AND MY STEPDAD HATES ME. I REALLY DONT KNOW THE POINT OF BEING HERE ANYMORE EVEN ASKING MY FRIENDS ARE U OK MAKES ME FEEL LIKE IM ANNOYING THEM. SO WHEN I STOP I DONT HEAR OF ANY OF THEM. I ALWAYS FEEL SO SO SO BAD WHEN I DONT REPLY TO PEOPLE WHEN ASKING QUESTIONS BUT SOMETIMES I JUST NEED SOME SPACE. I NERLY CRY EVERYNIGHT BEFORE BED OR I CRY MYSELF TO SLEEP EVERY NIGHT. I DONT SEE THE POINT IN LIFE ANYMORE, PEOPLE DONT UNDERSTAND EVEN IF THEY MAKE JOKES IT REALLY UPSETS ME EVEN IF THEY SAY IT AS A JOKE AND BECS OF WHAT SOMEONE SAID I DONT EAT AANYMORE IM LITERALLY STARVING MYSELF SO I GET SKINNY. I WOULD LOVE SOMEONE WHO ACTAULLY CARES ABOUT ME AND WONT MAKE FUN OF WHAT I LOOK LIKE OR THE THINGS I DO I WISH SOMETIMES I COULD JUST RUN AWAY AND DONT TALK TO ANYONE, I WANNA SEE WHO ACTAULLY CARES AND WHOS THERE OR ME. I HATE EVERYSINGLE THING I DO, IM A REALLY BAD OVERTHINKER AND I GET STRESSED OUT EASLY. AND MY GF ALWAYS ASKS IF IM MAD AT HER BECS I DONT RESPOND TO HER. I GET RELLY BAD THOUGHTS OF SELF...... AND SOMETIMES HOW I COULD KMS. I MADE A VENT ACCOUNT ON TT AND SOME PEOPLE SAY IT HELPS BUT IT DOESNT. SOMETIMES ITS GOOD TO JUST SAY IT ALL OUT AND THATS WHY I MADE THE VENT ACCOUNT. I REALLY JUST DONT WANNA BE HERE ANYMORE................