Notes

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When my wife's mother, "Grandma G," died, she left us many gifts and intangibles. She also left us something very tangible, that in the immediate hour of need, was her most thoughtful gift. She had prearranged and paid for her funeral in exacting detail. This single act, greatly lowered the magnitude of stress that her death had caused.

Daniel Goleman, author of "Emotional Intelligence," thinks people who pursue their goals have less anxiety and distress. Though the last few weeks have been filled with distress I thought I was capable of identifying new goals. One goal was already clear. The instant our daughter died my husband and I dedicated ourselves to protecting and caring for our twin grandchildren. "There must be other goals," I said to myself.

Learn a little in the morning, join the family on the ski slopes in the afternoon. it's not a bad way to spend a few days. The problem is that this is a horrible way to do strategic planning!

There are volumes of books written about specific evidence that there is life beyond the gates of death. Religious or social beliefs, teachings, culture or tradition has not presented a concrete evidence of life after death. There are those who do not believe there is life beyond. Death is the end. These can only be subject to argument- they can neither be proved or disproved.

You may need to get some old 8mm, 16mm or super 8 film converted into a digital form so you can add a clip of that to your funeral slideshow. But here's a hint: don't just go for the cheapest. Some converters don't even look at what they are doing with your priceless old film and the final result can be very dark, or very light, or it may have horrible ragged black edges.

The more information you have to start with the easier it is. If you know someone who has knowledge of the person you are looking for then you can find out if someone is dead by simply asking your mutual friend. Knowing where the person lived can narrow your search down considerably and in the unlikely event that you know the persons social security number then finding them should be easy.


If you are having troubles choosing what kind of funeral your loved one should have then by all means speak with the funeral director. It is the funeral directors job to assist with every aspect of the funeral. They will have lots of ideas and even videos and brochures for you to look at. Remember even though this may be your first funeral to plan it certainly is not theirs. So relax and allow the experts to help you through this difficult time. They will even be able to assist you if you would like to have a themed funeral. Whatever you want they will be able to arrange for you. No matter how outrageous or traditional or religious based your choice may seem, rest assured they have seen and planned one like it before.

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