Notes

I bring up my knees as you get closer, physically trying to defend myself. I seem way too nervous even though your actions were completely normal and I would never react this way before. It's not just Tom I am afraid of, I am afraid of touch, I am afraid of stepping out of line. "I will cancel my dentist appointment.. we can meet at the Roasters coffee shop just beside it" I cave

I was so used to being touched without giving my permission. You even did the same in the kitchen. A part of me thinks everyone has the potential to behave like Tom. "He is really drunk, I think he will just pass out downstairs" I talk quietly, I am just used to keeping my voice down at this point. "You should really not stay up here though... I will be there tomorrow at noon. I promise"

I was too scared to go downstairs. Things seemed quiet, the TV was off, Tom's shouting subsided. After some waiting I finally fell asleep in the bed, relieved I didn't have to share it with Tom. You gave me the greatest gift, a good nights sleep. When I wake up it's 9 am. Tom is still out of it but I put a big glass of water on the coffee table and some advil to help his hangover. Luckily, when he was that hungover he wasn't aggressive, just grumpy. I head out early to avoid him. He knows my schedule and he tracks my location on my phone so I go some grocery shopping and then wait for you at the coffee shop. It's right in the same building so I know my location would make sense. I am wearing a knitted beige turtleneck sweater and light wash jeans. My hair is up in a braid.

I set my phone down to keep track of the time, it would look weird if I was at the dentist for too long. "I promised" I say softly. Tom managed to just destroy my confidence and my passions. Any time I talked about something I wanted to or was interested in he would tell me to be silent. I learned to hold my mouth shut, I learn to keep quiet. Now that I am alone with you, I don't know how to act anymore. I order a regular coffee and a croissant, this is my first meal of the day. My body language is tense, my legs are crossed and I am keeping my hands close to myself "He was sleeping, I left him something to help with the hangover"

Parts of my old self surface as you remines on the past and I find myself easing up. My shoulders relax and I order more food. I get my appetite back, wanting to eat and feel full. It was hard to eat around Tom, he had a lot of negative things to say about my body and it made me insecure and nervous. I took at my phone and sigh. "I can't stay much longer.. he tracks my location" I admit. "We can so somewhere else? I just can't be at the 'dentist' for too long, he might suspect something". It was crazy, we weren't doing anything wrong yet it felt so needlessly secretive

I bite the inside of my cheek nervously. "I guess I thought marriage meant we try to work things out. I..I always thought I would be able to stay with my husband for a life time. I wanted a family that is together and happy. My parents split when I was young and I really wanted my future children to have a whole family to them." I finish my coffee and think. "We can leave my phone and car at the hospital?" I suggest

Over the weeks it was abundantly clear that Tom is abusive. I have called you a few time in the middle of the night telling you I was scared of him. I often was hiding bruises or was very quiet. It would always take an hour for me to act like myself when we met up. I didn't approve of you making him drunk, in fact we argued about it. I was against it because I knew it was just making things worse in the longterm. I was trying to get Tom to admit he had a problem but it went very poorly. This is when you proposed the getaway. It was in a smaller town a few hours away with lots of shops and countryside attractions. You rented the air bnb with 1 bedroom but it had a pull out couch in the living room. I paid my half in cash so that it wouldn't be on my credit card history. On the drive I was quiet and shaky. I didn't talk much about the specifics of what happens when him and I are alone but you can assume most of it is not consensual if not all of it. I play some calm music while looking out the window, feeling better with each mile you drive me away from him

My anxiety was through the roof but the physical distance helped me get a clearer head. I wanted to feel safe again, I wanted to feel comfortable with myself again. There was a lot I didn't tell you. I hated that I have destroyed your relationship with Tom. It made me really sad that I was a reason your family was no whole anymore. I join you on the couch and look around the room. I am in a white button down shirt and longer green shirt that goes to the middle of my shins. I cross my legs as I sit, being formal and polite. "You picked out a really nice place" I smile, trying to make myself relax. Luckily I turned off my location, I made up an excuse so Tom wouldn't think about it. The worst part was that while I was away meeting you, Tom was hooking up with random tinder dates (you may choose to know or not know this. My character doesn't know)


I look at your hand and blush, not hesitating like I would if were in the city before. I intertwine my fingers with yours and lean my face against your shoulder. "I missed you too.. thank you for encouraging me to leave for a bit. I really needed the push". I comment for the first time that I am grateful for our time. Sometimes the way I behaved would make it seem that you were making things difficult for me. "What did you have planned for tonight?"


I lean into you, enjoying the warmth. When you kiss my head it didn't feel like anything too intimate, it just felt like you were being caring and sweet. I didn't feel that it was over stepping or that you were pushing something on me. "It's perfectly fine" I assure you. "I would love to go for that walk". I squeeze your hand.

I blush. It's been a while since I have felt attractive and you have brought back feelings I remember trying to repress when I first met you and Tom introduced us. I remember thinking just how fortunately someone you date would be. I feel guilty for this. I am married, what am I doing here on a weekend get a way? My smile fades a little and I look to the ground. I never thought I would be an unfaithful wife, I always thought I would marry and stay with Tom forever.

I look up at you "You're right, I get I am just grieving what I thought my life would be like by this point. I didn't mean to kill the mood" I assure you and lean into your side. I wonder how long I can keep my feelings. It was easy when I was a teenager I just ignored them but now, my feelings for you are strong and supported. I had moved my wedding ring to a different finger, not feeling like I want it on the right place. It didn't feel right anymore.

"I wish it was that easy" I laugh. We go out for dinner and it was around 6 pm. I seemed to be less shy. The distance is doing wonders. I actually eat my whole meal. I haven't been too open about having a hard time eating but I did mention it casually before. I drink some wine as you look over the dessert menu. "Anything interesting?" I ask kindly

"Mhm, I think I want the tiramisu" I look over the menu, surprising myself that I can still eat after a pretty big meal. When it comes to the bill I try to pay in cash but you insist I keep it for something else. Walking back to our room, I am much more relaxed, holding your hand and my posture not as tense. I really needed this weekend




I have showered already, wearing a pull over hoodie and long pajama pants. I dressed very conservatively, even in private. My hair is damp and in waves, I have pulled it up into a loose braid. "Oh.. not that's not fair at all. I am smaller than you, the couch would be more comfortable for me" I try to reason. I still have some odd body language, hugging my torso, being tense if touched without warning

"Well I'll atleast keep you company for a bit" I smile and cuddle into your side. I hug your arm and lay on my side as we watch the TV. I can smell your soap and shampoo on you, it was all so comforting and clean. I pull the blanket over our legs, sometimes looking up at you to see if you were looking at me

I think for a moment and then cuddle into you more, pressing into you and processing the request. I wish I could just kiss you without any thought but I felt so much guilt and turmoil over it. Never in a million years did I think I would be in this situation. It takes me a few minutes but then I look up at your eyes, your lips. I couldn't help myself anymore. "Yes" I sit up more "Please" I add.


I naturally progress to sitting on your lap, looking down at you as my head is now on a higher level. I tilt your face up and kiss you deeper. I cave into my feelings, letting them take over. My hair falls from the loose braids and tickles your face. I push it aside and kiss at your cheeks. I stop for a moment, pressing my forehead against yours

I put my hand on top of yours and press my cheek against your palm, nodding. I kiss you gently again and then pull away "I don't think I can hide how I feel about you anymore." I whisper. It physically hurt to keep myself away from you. I wanted you more than anything. I wanted your safety, your kindness, your humor, your body. My hands travel to your shoulders, feeling your strength.

Everything you say cures years of repressed feelings and guilt. I never knew you felt the same about me. I thought I wasn't good enough for you. "Why didn't you say anything before?" I ask, running my hands through your hair, wishing I never married Tom.

"I can't stay with him." I sigh and get off your lap and sit beside you, holding your hands. "Will you be there for me? I know it's a lot to ask ... but I am terrified to tell him I am leaving. I have no idea what he might do... I'd have to secretly move my things over time until I am ready to tell him." I look defeated. "Will your parents understand?". I get anxious, it would look awful to an outsider. People would think I cheated

"The house is in my name, eventually I would have to evict him" I sigh and get up, grabbing a glass of water and sitting back down with you. I feel overwhelmed by the future ahead. "What now?" I turn to you

I nod and hold your hands, feeling the back of your hands with my thumbs. I start to understand you would never hurt me like he did. You'd never form a fist. I look into your eyes "Tell me then... how to feel good"

"I know. I'm ready. I am done being shy and damaged" I get closer to you. "I don't want you to treat me like I am. I want you to show me what you would do if were were just two people who have feelings for each other." I pull off my hoodie. I am wearing a tanktop underneath, no bra. The outline of my breasts are rather visible

I get a little confused when you say you like to be dominant. You were always so gentle with me, so kind and collected. I nod a little. "I am sure... will you stop if I ask you to?" I ask, a bit worried about your answer but I do trust you with my whole heart

I put my hand to my neck, getting a little flustered. "I wouldn't be okay with chocking ... for now" I set my limits and don't mention the others. "I wouldn't mind you being in charge. I would prefer it that way if anything" I assure you and get closer, my tank top leaves little to the imagination. "Show me" I ask once more

I run my fingers through your hair, reading to let myself loose for you, ready to give in. I close my eyes and let out out a soft moan through your kiss. We weren't teenagers, we have experience, we know what we are doing. I use my tongue and then slightly bite at your lower lip, seeing how you react

I wrap my legs around your waist and look at you towering above me. My back arches for your as you kiss my skin, finding the right spots, the right pressure. My hands run to your back and slip under the hem of your shirt, feeling your back and skin. I start pulling at the hem, wanting your shirt off

At first the top was just gathered under my chin but then you tossed it aside in the same direction as your shirt. This seemed passionate and loving. I wasn't scared anymore. I am stronger that you think, I can handle this and much more. I casually explore your body as you please my breasts and leave marks on me. When you pull away you see a very large bruise on my rib cage, only a foot could have caused a bruise of that size. I look up at you, wondering what you must be thinking. " I am stronger than you think"

It was so unusual to have the pleasure be focused on me. I was so used to just being an after thought or not even attended to at all. Your soft strokes on my clit and entrance make me glistening wet. My pussy is shaved and clean. I smell like the tangerine soap the host left for us to use. My thighs sometimes squeeze your head in between them until you remind me to relax. Despite being experienced, I wasn't used to this. I pull your shoulders wanting you to come back up. I kiss your lips, not caring that you were just eating me out. "Take me to the bedroom" I ask, wrapping my legs around your waist

I was shamelessly enjoying myself, squirming under you and pushing my hips up wanting you inside me. I was on the pill so I didn't care for protection in the moment. I trusted you, I want you. I look up at you as you stop entertaining me, asking me to beg for you. I've never had to beg or ask for sex, it was always just given to me weather I wanted it or not. "I want you" I get flustered and shy but my first try isn't convincing enough. I try to do better. "Please, I want your cock inside me" I plead now, squirming under your mercy

I pull at my own hands, testing your strength as you pin me. I look up at you, my eyes showing clearly that I am in a bit of discomfort. It was our first time like this, I didn't understand why you would be so rough with me, why you would be so forceful. "Slow down" I warn you, trying to push you off of me, not ready for you to force yourself inside me like that. It was too much "It hurts when you push in like that" I explain

"Just let me get used to it" I nod and bring your head to mine, kissing your lips. My other hand bringing in your hips, setting a pace I am comfortable with. " I know what I said but you can't just fuck me like that on our first time" I giggle a little, not feeling like you did something wrong "Let me work up to it"

"Much" I give it try again "I want you to fuck me now, the way you want. I am ready I promise. I want your cock to fill me over and over. I don't care where you cum, I don't want you to tell me." I put my hands to my sides so you can pin me if you'd like.

Through moans and gasps I manage a smile as you fuck me hard, your balls slapping my ass over and over. My left leg was on your shoulder, I am nearly in the splits for you. You come closer and we press into eachother. I kiss and bite at your right shoulder, to keep myself from screaming. "I'm yours"

I am light headed as you put me on top of you, straddling your hips. I put my hands on your shoulder but then I gasp when you pin them behind my own back. I am forced to ride you, my tits up and bouncing freely and my hips at your mercy. I moan and scream, having no shoulder to bit into anymore. None of my sounds are muffled anymore. I whimper in pleasure

My hands are free again and I put them on your shoulder to stabilize myself. My hair flows freely and we have passionate and wild sex. I throw my head back, moaning without shame as my small body shakes on your cock, completely surrendering myself to you.

I collapse on to your chest, unable to hold myself up a moment longer. My face is burred in your neck and I moan "then cum" I tell you passionately "Cum for me, wherever you want"