Notes

I genuinely don't know what's wrong with me. I don't know if im in the right or am i in the wrong or if it's the lack of communication I have with my mother that made us like this. Nonetheless she is trying her best to understand me and I think it's the lack of self-awareness I have that are causing this. I believe that there are circumstances that she's wrong, but I can't always say im right because that is not inherently correct because no one is always right although there are circumstances that makes me feel as if I'm being pushed to the edge. I don't like being alone with my thoughts for the reason that no matter what my thoughts are it always ends up being pessimistic. Thats one thing I'm trying to avoid but somehow, I can't help myself, whenever I try being my best something always pushes my button that brings me back to where I was before. I'm always finding ways to better myself, like being less of an awful person (I was such a bitch ever since I was a child lol), and actually trying to do something instead of complaining. I envy people who aren't like me, cuz they're better. I want to know what's wrong with me but at the same time how would I know that the strangers won't tell my mother.

#Confession