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Paul: Caaaarl, what did you do?!
Carl: Me? Uh, I didn't do this!
Paul: Explain what happened, Carl!
Carl: I've never seen him before in my life!
Paul: Why did you kill this person, Carl?
Carl: I do not kill people. That is…that is my least favorite thing to do.
Paul: Tell me, Carl, exactly what you were doing before I came home.
Carl: Alright, well…I was upstairs…
Paul: Okay…
Carl: I was uh…I was sitting in my room…
Paul: Yes?
Carl: reading a book…
Paul: Go on…
Carl: And, uh, well this guy walked in…
Paul: Okay…
Carl: So, I went up to him…
Paul: Yes…
Carl: And I…I stabbed him 37 times in the chest.
(Silence.)
Paul: Caaaaaaaaaaaaarl, that KILLS people!
Carl: Oh! Well, I didn't know that!!
Paul: How could you not know that?!
Carl: Yeah, I'm in the wrong here. I SUCK.
(silence)
Paul: What happened to his hands?
Carl: What's that?
Paul: His hands. Why—why are they missing?
Carl: Well, I kind of umm…cooked them up. And ate them.
(silence)
Paul: Caaaaaaaaaarl!!
Carl: Well, I—I was hungry. And well, you know, when you crave hands…
Paul: Why on earth would you do that?!
Carl: I was hungry for hands! Gimme a break!
Paul: Caaaaaarl!
Carl: My stomach was making the rumblies.
Paul: Caarl!
Carl: That only hands would satisfy!
Paul: What is wrong with you, Carl?!
Carl: Well, I kill people and I eat hands! That's—that's two things!
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