Notes

On Wednesday, I was walking back from p.e after Paige had been a completely bitch to me, she was just telling me to fuck off, i walked back to school alone crying and just really fucking depressed, I went to get something to eat but i was so embarrased that i was by myself, and went to the toilet to eat my food. i really need you to hear how that sounds. I went to eat food in the toilet. and i was really really really sad, this was at breaktime, so afterwards I had sociology, and the teacher had changed the seating plan i was angry because i wouldn't get to sit next to ellie and klesilda, my safe option, i got to sit next to heloisa, ose and merleka, which at first sounded bad, but were really nice and i found that i had a good time in sociology, ose had strong opinions which we talked about and me and heloisa joked around. but then came lunchtime. and i realized i would be alone again. but i wasn't as upset as before, sociology really cheered me up, i went to the library and sat down, and that's when i heard charlene, yetunde, heloisa and kate on the otherside, i told myself i wouldn't talk to them, but then i did, and we had a really nice conversation. We talked about miss johns widdet and other teachers, then it was time to go to drama, i really didn't want to but i did and jaden surprsingly was really nice to me and walking back home i realized that, you know what it wasn't that bad.

i was so happy when you said that you were coming into school, i waited outside of your form room, but you weren't there, i went to your english class but weren't there either and i realized you weren't in, i was really angry and realized i had to spend the day by myself again, but i found aleah and went library with her, but then she ditched me and i went on the computers to go on hangouts and talk to you, but it was blocked. and that's when andrea said hi to me, and i was actually really happy to see her and we went lunch together, and she talked about internal for a while and i didn't really care, but i felt better as if i didn't have to rely on you, and we spent lunchtime together too, we walked around and saw tyrese and he was joking that he was gonna steal from us and we acc talked a lot and me and heloisa pretended to fight and miss brickell came it was soooo funny and it was time to go to lesson but me and andrea came late and we went with tyrese and his friend (don't know what his name is) and we were laughing soo much, but we were really late, but andrea went medical room so we had an excuse, music was fine, but thats when i realized i wouldnt had been able to go with tyrese if you had been in that day, because i wouldn't have wanted you to feel left out and the same with andrea, and you know what, andrea can be a pain in the arse sometimes but she is actually really nice and wayy more fun than you do, you're always so scared of everything and andrea doesn't have someone she relies on, sometimes she has sad days when she is by herself but she takes risks, and i want to take risks too, me and andrea are actually really similar and you hold me back, you really do and thats why i don't want to be friends anymore, i'm sorry but at least now you have an explenation