Notes

It was a cold, dreadful Thursday morning. I had to walk to school with the people the called friends. my "Friend's" would make me feel awful. Make him feel, fat,ugly, useless, stupid. I decide to take a different route to school.
When I get to school my first greeting was,”hey, faggot.” I shudder. "H-hey Noah" I stuttered. I try to turn the corner but, "Where you think you're going?" "I need to get to f-first period." "not so fast, fatty"
Noah dragged me into the closest bathroom and shoved my head into the toilet. Noah ran off when he heard the school bell rang. I just sat there in the corner of the bathroom crying in the corner.
I was late to second period because I had to wash the urine out of my hair. Mr. Hutchinson gave me detention, not believing what he called a "sob story".
Second and third period went by in a blur, now to lunch. I go into my usual hiding spot, the 4th bathroom. I go into one of the big stalls and just a few minutes pass and I hear someone enter the restroom, I hold my breath hoping the person won't hear me. "God, Da** it!" then I hear a loud thud on the wall, I yelp at the sudden noise. "Hello?" I hear the person say I put hands over my mouth hoping that the person would go away. I hear the restroom door open and shut. I sigh in relief, I leave the stall, lunch is over in a couple minutes, I think to myself. I turned the corner to get too the exit. "There is someone in here!"
"Please don't hurt me" I say as I quiver in front of this tall, muscular man. "Hey, i'm not gonna harm ya" this guy talked in a very deep voice. "What make you think i'm gonna hurt a cutie like yourself." A tingle goes up my spine when he says "cutie". "the name's Jake, yours?". "U-um, Lewis" "Shouldn't you be at lunch?" Jake asks me. "Shouldn't you?" I retort back with the little confidence I have. "I asked first." Jake retorts back to me. "I um" I have to think of an excuse, I think to myself. "I wasn't hungry." I say shyly. "So, you can still sit down there and hang out with friends" Jake says to me questioningly. "My friends don't like me". "Then why do you call them friends?" he says with a bit of doubt. "They're all I got, no one else will talk to me." I say as I tear up. "Hey, hey don't be sad, we can be friends". My eyes go wide. "R-really?" I say shockingly. "Yeah, you seem like a cool guy, and a cute one." Jake says flirtatiously. My face glows red when he says that. I finally have a friend that won't hurt me.
Jake and I sat and talked till the bell rang. Jake is only in one of my classes and that's my Last period, which is my study hall. I'll My classes go by quickly, nothing happening. I'm going down the steps to go to my last class when someone pushes me from behind. I roll down the steps landing on my arm, I look up and see people all around me laughing. I look up the stairwell and see my friend Chris smirking down at me like the jerk he is. I try to get u but someone pushes me down and kicks me in the jaw, "Fag!" the girl yells at me harshly. Once she yells that people started kicking me left and right, the bell rings and everyone evacuates the hallway. I sit there for a few minute hoping someone would come and help me, but no one came.
I crawled my way to my last class. “If you're late again I will have to give you detention” Mr. Spid says aggressively. “Y-yes sir.” I say shyly. Jake waves me over from across the room. I walk across to him quickly, not wanting the attention from the rest of the class. “Hey Lewis, how are you?” Jake says while giving me a warm smile. “What happened to your face?” Jake says Curiously. I tense up. Crap, I forgot about my face. “U-um” I stutter. “Did someone do this to you?” He says worryingly. I glance Behind me and everyone was whispering to themselves, looking at me like I was mad. “Who didn’t do this to me?” I say sarcastically. I sit down next to him, lay my head down and went to sleep.
I wake up to the sound of the bell ringing. “Baby, if this happens again yell for me I’ll be there in a flash.” He say while he winks. I walk to the detention room,and no one is in there At least I’m the only one in here… I sigh peacefully deciding to just sit back and wait till 6. The teacher who was left with detention duty let me leave an hour early, saying he believed me about my story, he probably just wanted to go home. I start to walk home. I get to the front of my house ten minutes later, from my front porch, I can hear yelling from the inside I hear yelling, fighting, and things being thrown. “”Not again...” I mutter to myself. I walk back to the the school and go behind the back building and lay down. I look at the school and see someone walking towards me it looks like they keep fading in and out of existence. Weird, I think to myself, I must be hallucinating. I close my eyes, and try to go to sleep, but I feel someone put there arm around me. I jerk my eyes open and look behind me, I see Jake’s face giving me a cute smile. “Isn’t a bit late for you to be at school?” Jake says. “It’s only 8.” I say Jokingly. “My family is fighting so, I’m sleeping here tonight” I say to Jake. “Mind if I stay here with you?” he says. “Not at all” I say back. “Love you, Lewis.” “Love you too, Jake.” Then I fade away into slumber.
When I wake up Jake is nowhere around. He left me, I shouldn’t have said I loved him back, He din’t mean it. I just have to get to class. While i’m speed walking to first period I glance behind me and I see jake running toward me, I fully turn around and he's not there. “What the-” the bell interrupts me. I run to first period and my teacher didn’t notice my absence.
Second and third period went by quickly, I decide to go to lunch because I didn’t eat dinner last night. I sit down at a empty table waiting to be called up to get my food. Jake comes and sits down next to me. “Where have you been?” “I had to run home and get some stuff” He says back. I look at him while he gives me this too cheerful of a smile, I blink for just a split second. It seems that he disappeared right before my eyes shut. I opened them quickly reopen them, Jake was still looking at me, looking frozen, Like he wasn’t real. Suddenly, everything made sense now. The looks I’d get when i’d talk to him, The hallucinations of him, the reason now one has been around me, I look up and no one is in the Cafeteria, just me and Jake.
He’s.. Not.. Real. I start uncontrollably crying . Is Anything Real…? I say Quietly. Is Anyone Real?! I yell. Suddenly feel someone grabbing my arm. I look over and it’s our Lunch monitor. “Hun, are you alright ” She says Worryingly. “I-I’m Fine.” I say holding my tears from spilling. I excuse myself and run to the restroom, I look in the stalls and don’t see anyone. I Start balling my eyes out. No one cares, only Jake did and he’s not here anymore! I look over and I see a Razor blade with blood on it. “Some emo probably left that there.” I mutter to myself. I picked it up, examining it. Blade so sharp one slice and your skin is in half, I think I have a idea, If I do this I won’t have to deal with this world anymore. I raise the blade and bring it down to my arm in a fast movement. Blood started to come out of my arm. I felt nothing, I slide down and lean my body against the wall. My eyelids starting going heavy. I don’t fight at all, no regret, no more pain. I close my eyes and accept this...