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Don't snoop behind people's houses... You might be mistaken for a trash can.
We all sprang from apes, but you didn't spring far enough.
I would ask how old you are, but I know you can't count that high.
Your mamma so fat she has to wear 2 watches because she covers two time zones.
When you were born, the doctor slapped your mom, animal control euthanized your brother, and A&E made a documentary that saved your life.
You're so fat you need cheat codes to play Wii Fit.
You're so fat the only letters of the alphabet you know are K, F, and C
You must be the arithmetic man; you add trouble, subtract pleasure, divide attention, and multiply ignorance.
With a face like yours, I wish I was blind.
Your mom is so stupid she tried to wake a sleeping bag.
Are you always an idiot or just when I'm around?
Yes only in your present, to make you feel you're not the only one.
If I wanted to kill myself, I could just climb up to your ego and jump down to your IQ level.
Two wrongs don't make a right, take your parents as an example
Your momma so fat, when she went to a doctor, she stepped on a scale and the doctor said "Hey, that's my phone number."
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