Notes

Okay well these past few days have been I guess you could say, decent. Jason had left because of his phone service and its been a lot more difficult then I thought. Seeing his initials in her bio breaks my heart little by little, because my eyes wonder on social media. I cant ever help not to look , its dreadful. Of course I don't want to go look but for some reason I always do, then I see something I don't want to see but its everyday I do this. I see the date, the hearts, his initials. it breaks me like I said before. Day by day, little by little. Well since it hurts so much, I've made distractions but some of my distractions are un necessary. For example finding guys to talk to, mistake. I did find one at one point but it didn't turn out well because the distraction just creeps me out. Although I did find a new distraction, Colby. Colby makes my heart happy, he makes me want to talk to him which is odd. He's very attractive as well, and he thinks I'm gorgeous. He's just s sweet and great to talk to, he even wants to meet one day. Although he lives a little away he says since we will continue to talk we may meet next summer. It's kind of exciting really. I'm hoping we get to talk so much more so that we can know each other more, he seems so great and I want to know everything about him. I've gotten interested in him. I have told him some things about me and so far he still stays unlike some guys. He even has his ears pierced, which just makes me drool.. he's very kind as well and so far respects me. I really want to talk on the phone because I just love late night phone calls where you talk for hours with someone. it has been some time since I've talked on the phone like that with a guy. I'm just getting too happy about this, hopefully I wont scare him off with the way I act. I just got to calm myself so I don't start getting clingy.