Notes

To the writer of Sve.

Hello, I see that you're back.

If you plan on staying, then I suppose I should clear the air. You are not obligated to read it, but I recommend that you do.

First of all, I apologize if my words or my phrasing might offend you in some way or another, it was not my intention to do so.

I've heard, from a few people, of how the Catastrophe had viewed me on the first war. Regarding the list, and the menfesses you had received. If you had forgotten it, then I shall remind you of it.

The list. The list of powers and weaknesses of the Hemitheoi. I did wonder how you came to know of its existence, yet that is of no importance. Under NO circumstances was I planning to TELL Vine of it. It was simply the Amethyst's works, and not only the Hemitheoi's was made. Oh? You might have found out because I asked the writers? You may call this an excuse, but I was asking for parts that weren't clear enough in their bio, and for those who haven't attached theirs. What made that list so different with the bio which has the more complete version of the ability? It was just for the sake of simplicity and all, and it was for the writers only, NOT for the character. Had you any proof that Vine knew of any of it? She had only met Saya and Estefan before. And even then she was not aware of their connection with the Catastrophe. Yes, I did make it. Yes, I did list the most important advantages and disadvantages of each member. No, I was not going to use it for personal use under any circumstances. If you do not count satisfying my own curiosity, that is. I did not know it was against the law to ask the writers about their characters. Besides, an ideal battle plot is one that had been carefully planned from the start to the ending by both parties, to avoid possible godmodding and the sort. So, pray tell what was it that was the source of all the anger I received, though behind my back.

I think that's all for the first part.

Moving on, the menfesses. The terror menfesses you had received due to Kiyoko's poisoning, wasn't it? I did NOT send them. I remembered a time when we ... talked? a bit on DM, and ... I don't quite remember who mentioned it before, but we talked about the menfesses for a bit. I think I expressed my condolences then? And there I thought we were cool, until I found out someone actually accused me to be the sender in the DM group. I'm sorry if I seem to be exaggerating, but that HURT. That hurt enough for me to still feel this heaviness in my chest every time I recall it. Just like this moment. I repeat, I did not send them. Moreover, again sorry if I seem exaggerating, I was one of those who tried to calm down the others in the Alliance's group DM, and to stop all the hate. We did not need the agency to actually split into two factions because of a war plot. I think that's also why I talked to you, to smooth things over. And why it hurt more when I found out you were ACTUALLY SUSPICIOUS OF ME AS WE TALKED. Pardon the caps lock, I could not help it. And pardon me for the exaggeration, but from that point onwards, still until now, I keep asking myself, what did I do wrong to all of you? Was Vine too cold that some of you thought I was the sender? I didn't even know of the terror menfesses until someone mentioned their existence! Or was it me who was in the wrong...? Was it because of the list? Was it because I HAD THE AUDACITY TO ASK THE HEMITHEOI'S WRITERS THEIR CHARACTERS' EXACT STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES? When did I ever forbid you from doing the same thing? Vine's ability was completed from before the war start, to make point of her strength and weaknesses so you could make sure I did not make an overpowered character... And ... were you suspicious enough to not believe I will not break the fourth wall...? I take my characters' interactions very seriously and I never want to slip into an out of character act. I've been there and felt more comfortable being in character... You might not believe me, but that thought had never crossed my mind, the thought to use the list fully to my advantage...

Oh, was that considered as ranting?

Pardon me for being so childish, yet I cannot keep on living without letting all these out. I need answers, yet I will not demand something you would not give.

You might not think much of the incident, but that had left a big gash inside of me, one I'm certain will not fade even with time. It was enough to bring me to the brink of depression when my new character could only fit in Catastrophe. It filled me with anxiety, of being rejected. I was, after all, the receiver of all that pent up anger, wasn't I? Though you all did your best to conceal it.

Congratulations for reading this far, then. I have no intention of making you feel uncomfortable or the sort, just thought that you should be the one reading this, not someone else. Because by then would I feel relieved.

Oh, you may also show this to the others, though I do hope you will keep this to yourself.

I thank you for your time. You might have forgotten, but I can not.

Best regards, Ama, Vine and Camellia's writer.