Notes

Should I Change My Approach?

So, you're about go on a date with a guy you met on Tinder. Congratulations, you millennial.

But let's say you haven't had much success lately in the dating world. Maybe you think you've held back some and are thinking of changing your approach.

Chris Rock has a bit where he says that when you meet someone for the first time, you're not meeting that person - you're meeting his or her representative. And there is definitely a lot of truth to that. There is a little bit of sales in everything and the dating scene is no exception. When you meet someone for the first time, you're trying to put forth your best self, but so is the other person. So what you may have is a conversation where two people are trying really hard not to step on each other's toes. And that can lead to boring conversation and that can only possibly lead to no further dates.

Unless you're anything like me and you order a cocktail or 12, and the conversation just honestly flows the rest of the evening.

That's not to say honesty will always yield positive results, but it's better to find out right away. Plus, it's just more fun.

Here is one thing we can all agree on. For the duration of the lifespan of the human species, men will never fully understand women, and women will never fully understand men. And yet, we are much more alike than we are dissimilar. Nobody has all of the answers, of course, but the one thing that must always happen is that you have to be true to who you are. If you're meeting someone for the first time, they have to see your true spirit right away. No exceptions. If you're really into classic cocktails and the other person doesn't like drinking, that's probably something you want to know sooner rather than later. Because what kind of monster doesn't enjoy a nice Old Fashioned? Or 12. Whatever, they were two-for-one, and I'm not mentally strong enough to say no to that.

This goes without saying, but if you're crushing it in the dating world, then do not change anything. You rock star. But If you want to tweak something, I have found that the most attractive qualities in a woman, besides someone who is visibly comfortable in their own skin, are knowing who you are as an individual and not compromising who you are for anyone. That doesn't only apply to the dating world, but to all aspects of life. Wow, I'm pretty much your psychologist now. You know, minus the whole degree and getting paid part,

Ok, time's up, but let's do this again. Same time, next week. Bring me a baked treat.