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I feel like my Dad loves me too much. It makes me kinda uncomfortable. Like when he pats or places his hand on my thigh. And how he gets upset that I don't go to his house enough.
I feel like there will be no one out there to comfort me and tell me it will be alright and that i will believe them.
I feel like an outsider everywhere I go. home. school. everywhere.
My anxiety holds me back from doing the things I love.
I fear no one takes me seriously when I tell them I am suicidal. That I am too young to feel that way and it is probably hormones or even ask if I have my period.
I am still effected by what happened. I still hear them whispering everywhere I go and i see those judgemental faces everyday. They made me feel unloved, unwanted and different.
I am sick of having to plaster on a fake smile just for other peoples benefit.
I am so scared every single day. An the panic attacks do not make it any easier.
I will never be like anyone else
I will always be the black sheep.
The "EASY TARGET".
and there is NOTHING I can do about it.
2 years old.
That is when it all began.
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