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1. Pada paragraf lima, kalimat tiga: "Namun, siapa yang menyangka bahwa justru Hirolah yang membuat perbedaan diantara tiga bersaudara yang terkenal akur ini menjadi sangat jelas terlihat?"
2. Pada paragraf delapan, kalimat dua: "Namun, karena dirinya terlampau aktif dan hampir 80% hari aktifnya dihabiskan di lingkungan sekolah, maka jadilah hubungan Hiro dengan saudara kembar dan adiknya menjadi amat renggang."
Selebihnya, saya beranggapan profil karakter Kwon Hirosuke sudah baik dan masuk akal ^^
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