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i write them on here most of the time, but i usually just delete them afterwards cause i just need to get it out, you know? like i just need to ramble even if no one will read it or see it or anything.
but i guess im sending this one so hi
i love you
with all of my heart completely
and i've never loved someone this much, i've never started randomly crying because i loved someone so much, i've never smiled out of nowhere because of someone or thought about someone all day.
never ever
and i know i say that a lot, i'm surprised you're not sick of hearing it honestly.
i probably come across as clingy. and i guess i can admit that i am.
but it's just because i love you so much that it's overwhelming and i don't know what to do and i want to give you all of my attention all the time because youre the thing that absolutely matters the most to me, no questions asked.
but i've never loved someone as much as i love you and it scares me
because i know i can mess this up
and i really really don't want to
maybe im just selfish but i never ever want to lose you
i will beg you to stay with all my heart if i needed to.
that's probably selfish to say
but i wanna tell you it
cause it's 110% true.
i love how i can talk to you for hours and not get bored of it.
i love how you're still here to talk to me despite all my stupid stuff
i love how you still say you love me when i feel like a useless puddle that no one actually likes and they talk to out of pity.
i have a lot of problems
but you help more than you could ever know
and that absolutely means the world to me.
i love that you tell me everything's okay when i start overthinking
i love that you help me stop crying when it's not for a good reason
i love how i can talk to you about anything
i should stop staying up so late, it's when my mind starts to go off and convince me things arent okay
and it's when you are asleep and i'm alone
i hate keeping you up though, so i just need to sleep earlier.
i want to grow old with you
i want to live my whole life with you
i wanna hug you and kiss you and just hold onto you
i just wanna do so much stuff and it hurts that i can't cause youre all the way over there and here i am smack dab in the middle of corn-infested nowhere in a town full of horses and people who hate others for no reason.
i put a lot on you and i'm sorry for that
i'll try to stop if you want me to
i just want you to know about me, i don't know why.
i want you to know of all my problems and know that i'm far from perfect because it makes me feel real that you know.
i want you to know what you're getting into by being my friend
i cry a lot, you know this already though
almost everyday actually
lately though it's always been good though because of you
happy crying more than sad crying.
you make me insanely happy
i don't know how to explain in words how much you mean to me
just know that it's a lotttt.
i'll end this before it gets too long though
don't wanna write you a novel or anything.
but just know i love you a lot, okay?
and i promise you that i always will.
okay, goodnight.
love,
reese
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