Notes

Grandma,

First of all, happy belated birthday. I know that we haven’t been in touch for awhile, but I needed to gather my thoughts first. It took so long because of the way you treated me when I was going on the trip to Japan, so when I wanted to reach out to you (and you would have been been the first besides Eric), I really hesitated because of the way you acted towards me.

Before that, I just wanted to point out that I didn’t disappear. As I understand, this is what you and other members of the family have been told. I was shocked to hear this because it’s not true. What really happened is that I told Tania not to contact me anymore for a variety of reasons. I want you to


*reasonable
because I needed to address some things and clear some things up. As I understand it, Tania told other members of the family that I disappeared, which was untrue.


Eric told me how other members of the family reacted, and it made me feel pretty alienated because


Anyways, I just wanted to let you know that I’m perfectly fine. Earlier this year, I told Tania to stop contacting me until I contacted her first. She was really stressing me out and lying to me to get my attention. It may seem like a small thing to cut off contact over, but this had been building up my whole life. The worst part about this situation is that it was between me and her only, but I’m told that she went and made it a family affair.



Anyways, I just wanted to let you know that I’m perfectly fine. As I understand it, Tania told everybody that I disappeared to make herself look (or feel) better, but what actually happened is that I told her to stop contacting me. The first thing she did was show Eric and told him that it was directed at both of them, even though it was only supposed to be between me and her. If you want to blame anybody, you can blame her for attempting to alienate me from everybody out her own hurt pride. What she did just validates why I needed to get away from the first place because she’s the kind of person to do something so weaselly.

I also wanted to let you know that I took so long to get in contact was because of the way you treated me when I went to Japan. but it really bothered me. When I told you that I was going, all you did was complain that I was being too vague about it which wasn’t fair. You know, I was only vague because the trip didn’t involve anybody but me and the person I was going with. A lot of the time it’s like everybody feels like they need to get involved in my business, even if I’m living independently and going on a trip that’s paid for me

A lot of the time everybody feels like they need to get involved in my business

however a lot of the time I feel like I need to withhold information because of how everybody feels like they need to get involved in my own business and life. This is a common theme for me throughout my entire life. You also told me to not to forget my password, which really rubbed me the wrong way because all it did was show me that you thought of me as a helpless, stupid girl. Maybe you did that because you were frustrated by how indirect I was about the trip, but I didn’t appreciate it. Also, when I came back and saw that you and Tania were trying to get ahold of me by acting like you were so worried made me extremely uncomfortable. Again, maybe you were just going along with her, but what she was doing was an act of control, something she’s done to me for my entire life.

but the reason I delayed it for so long was because you did some stuff in regards to me going to Japan.


The reason I delayed it so long was because you did some stuff that made me uncomfortable in regards to how you acted towards me when I went to Japan.

It may seem minor to you, but

It may seem minor to you or that I’m being sensitive, but the way you treated me before and after my trip to Japan threw me off.

When I told you that I was going, you told me that I was being too vague about it and also not to forget my passport. This said a lot about how you think of me, both that you feel like

Before I left, you said that I was being vague and told me not forget my passport. Maybe you wereI was only vague about it because the trip didn’t involve anybody but me and the person I was going with.

I’m aware that I haven’t been in touch, but I needed time to gather my thoughts and I had a hard time approaching it. Just so you know, you and Grandpa would be the first family members that I would contact besides Eric. However, I delayed doing so because you did some stuff that made me a little uncomfortable. I know it may seem minor to you or like I’m being “sensitive”, but the way you acted towards me in regards to going to Japan threw me off. You told me not to forget my passport,

which showed me that you think I’m that clueless. Maybe you were doing it because you were frustrated over how vague I was being about it, but I was only vague because it’s not really something that should matter to anybody but me so I approached it that way. I have a hard time expressing my thoughts because of how involved everybody typically tries to get, as if I’m incapable of thinking and acting for myself. That was also apparent when I got back and both you and Tania were trying to get ahold of me. It seemed scary because instead of legitimate concern, it felt like an act of control. Maybe not on your part, and maybe you were just backing Tania up, but regardless, that’s why I took so long to get in touch. I feel like you’re the most reasonable person in the family, so I wanted to be honest with you.

Anyways, I didn’t actually disappear or anything. What actually happened is that I told Tania to stop contacting me. She decided to make it a family affair to make everything complicated because s

Anyways, I didn’t disappear or anything, I just told Tania to stop contacting me, but she decided to make it a family affair and make everything complicated. That wasn’t right of her at all to do, and just goes to show you where my actions of cutting off contact with her are coming from. I just had reached my limit with her but it should have been between me and her and shouldn’t have extended to anybody else. I’ve had a lot of problems with her, but she doesn’t seem to realize that I’m a grown up now.

I hear that Eric is moving in with you,

I have a lot I want to tell you, but I need to know that we’re on the same page first and that it’ll just be between you and me (well, and Grandpa).

Natashav