Notes

Number one rule of communication is to reflect. In most cases, write as long messages as she does and respond as frequently or as infrequently as she does.
Also, if you end up in chat conversation with her, let it be short and be the one to cut it before it becomes too long. Leave them wanting more and give yourself and her time to reflect internally.
Also, play the game. If serious stuff is mentioned, reflect upon that, take it seriously and respond as such, but be the one to turn it lighthearted and fun again with a smart word play or a joke.

Just don't over do it. Keep your messages simple, and know that she most likely read your text or saw your post moments after you sent it. We're all glued to our phones, and if she wants to respond, she'll respond. Never be that guy that sends a follow up text, or say something like "hello?", or "guess not...", or anything like that. That's how you come off needy and desperate and lacking confidence. I also like to follow their cues with emojis and the like. If she uses a shitload of emojis and punctuation, I will too, if she doesn't, I don't. Let her set the pace. If you text a girl "how's your day?" and she says something like "good, you?", she's probably not as into chatting as the girl who responds with 8 texts about what she's having for lunch. Mostly just don't over do it.

What I found best was messaging something different that catches their attention and makes them laugh. For example you could say a cheesy joke or make a reference to something they like. Even if what you say doesn't make sense but cracks a smile they'll like it and even a response like "lol what?" Means you've got her. Starting with hey how are you or hi are too common, act like a friend and be different and they will want to get to know you.

Be direct.
Talk for a few messages, move to number. Don't play the constant texting game. Just ask if she wants to do stuff. Go for coffee, check something out, see a movie, go out with a bunch of friends, etc.
The more you use text to communicate, the less person-like you become. You see people texting while they're out the entire time? Think of the people on the other side of that conversation, they are the nobodies that keep a girl entertained until something fun happens at the bar.

When you have reached enough insight and confidence to not care if you get rejected. Girl flakes, you go read a book or to the gym. Later that week you see a girl you like, you say what's on your mind. The hardest part is when you actually try but you fail. If you can do that then you're good. It's about personal growth.

If she doesn't reply to previous conversations and you constantly message her. That's needy. Sometimes it's difficult but you need to take a hint and forget about her if you've tried at least 3 times.

You simply don't be, and having to ask means you can't fake it.
When you have enough going on and you have reached the mental state that you REALLY don't actually care that much, then you won't be sitting there analysing every time it says 'seen' and you don't see her typing back. Or asking yourself if it's too soon or not soon enough to reply, and agonising for 30mins over what to type to make sure it's perfect.
I was there, and quite simply, you are either needy or you're not.

Just talk to her. Be interested in her life. Relate to her. Just have a conversation. You're already interested in her. She knows this because you're talking to her. The trick is to make her interested in you. You can do this by relating to her day, what some of her struggles or trimuphs that she tells you about.
That's your first step.


Do, however, ask her neutral questions. "What kind of movies do you like?", "Have you ever been to (whatever place)", "Did you hear about (whatever)?" Ask how she is. Inquire about things she has previously brought up that is relevant to her life. For example, if she previously told you she was going to see her grandmother, then ask how that went.

Keep it casual and short

Reflektuj jej písanie... odpisuj jej len tak dlhé správy ako ona odpisuje tebe... vytvor si rovonováhu... udržuj v komunikácií rovnováhu (vo všetkej)

Give yourself an hourly texting limit, if you’re constantly texting.

Recognize signs that the other person is no longer interested. It happens sometimes, for a variety of reasons, but one thing is for sure--showering the person with more attention will never change their mind. Persistence is not the answer! Pulling away may be the person's way of jumping ship without confronting you. Any prodding from you won't change the way they feel, and deep down inside, you know that. If someone doesn't have the decency to respond, they're not worth your time. You deserve better than that.

Know that it's OK to be single. Many people remain single and still enjoy their life to the fullest. They have freedom and fun, and in many cases they are just as happy as people in a relationship. The deeper truth is that having a relationship is a want, not a need. The problem comes when you make it a need and start believing that you can't survive without it.
Try this exercise: when a needy thought comes into your head, repeat a mantra to yourself. Say "I am strong," or "I have everything I need." Repeat something in your head that helps you feel like a whole person who doesn't need anyone else to live.
Listening to music and watching movies about freedom and strength can also help.

Act like you want a best friend or significant other, but you definitely don't need them.

Try not to seek out a new relationship until you're sure you won't fall into the same old patterns.


Reap the benefits of being independent. Being secure and non needy makes you more attractive. It's like a trick: the more secure and non needy you genuinely are, the more attractive you become. Once you're really independent, you'll know it. You'll be confident enough to handle relationships without worrying excessively about what the other person thinks. You'll cherish your alone time as much as your time with the person you love.


Understand that the human mind is inherently needy. Our mind is pretty hyperactive as it always wants to do or acquire something and when you don't have something to do that's when you feel needy or bored or frustrated. So its a pragmatic practice to channel that neediness/hyperactivity to activities that you enjoy. Seeking new activities, following your passions, relationships etc, help in dealing with neediness, but temporarily. People who seem non needy are simply acting out their mind's activeness, constructively and/or creatively in other areas of life. Or they have their want or need satisfied from another person. Hence when you meet them they seem non-needy and attractive.

Being too needy will only set you up for rejection. And that will lower your self esteem, creating deeper loneliness.

Do anything that brings you joy and makes you happy. Avoid too much alone time. Get out of the house, join your friends for a night out, the more interests and hobbies you have the more appealing you're gonna be!

Love yourself
Value yourself!