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I went outside the other day,
I went to walk around;
And there I saw a porcupine
Flying underground.
A weasel then looked up at me,
“Good morning, sir”, it said;
And then it took a cricket bat
And hit me in the head.
A badger bit me on the toe,
A bumblebee said “MOO”,
And then a dog poo stepped in me:
I got stuck to its shoe.
I have an intermittent fear
Of carpets, ducks and cheese:
That’s the state your mind gets in
When taking LSD.
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