Notes

i've thought of ending it, so many times. im trying, with school, with life and just being home in general. I come home from the gym and im anoyyed with everyone. with my mom mainly, she pisses me off sometimes with school and college. God! i try so hard in school, i try in life, i go to the gym to be better to get healthier but when i wear a sports bra that i think looks good and im happy, she just syas, " i think you gained weight." and that makes me hate my self. i try, but nothing is good enough for her. and when i wear a bathing suit i dont want to show her because she'll only judge and say i gained weight. but if i dont show her she gets mad and says why did you buy it if your not going to show me. I dont show her because she always judges me! i'm not enough for her and she makes sure i know it everyday. so why am i still here? I don't know why i'm still here. i dont have any real friends. i hate my self! I'm mad at my self.