Notes

Sometimes its extremely hard for me to bite my tongue with stupid comments you say and how you treat me in front of my family. I have thought long and hard about our relationship these past three years. So far, You have flat out cheated on me, lied continuously over and over again about pretty much everything you have ever tried to keep from me, you said you would change. It took me about 3-5 months for you to get your exs out of your life and you didn't care when I told you some of the hateful things Robey was doing and saying to me, you have constantly kept secrets from me, you have never ever stood up for me nor my family unless I bitched at you about it long enough. I have literally given up everything I ever loved to do and have given up my time and energy with my family to be with you AND I know I didn't have to do that but I did because I loved you that much and really wanted to be with you and make this relationship try to work out as best as it could. I have put every ounce of effort into this relationship. At the beginning, I pretty much paid and planned almost every single date we have been on. I have argued and fought with my family to be with you and I have dealt enough cruel and stupid shit from your family. I have never asked you to do much for me except treat me with respect( which you don't), defend me and protect me( which you don't either), put more effort in the relationship and the list can go on forever. After 3 years of being with you and having a child with you, I would think you would treat me more with respect and honesty. I have seriously thought about going back to counseling because I feel like a doormat to you and I really need to evaluate if this is even going to work out. I can't even talk to you or vent to you because anything and everything I say to you, you don't care nor do you even listen. You always say sorry and then you do the same shit over and over. You get so much pity from my family and your family. I am always the bad guy somehow and I am so sick and tired of how somehow you never want me to be right. Your EGO is so fucking big that your dick seems to be getting smaller. If you actually evaluated our relationship, I know that I haven't been perfect either nor have I been a great female in your life but I have been through hell and back with this relationship and I have no idea what to think or do anymore. I have been 100% honest since day 1, loyal, caring, loving, and supportive of everything and anything when it comes to you. I deserve so much better and I feel like this is the end of my happiness when it should be the most happiest point in my life. I really don't know if I even need you in the delivery room with me because you have never been supportive, you laugh when people are in pain or crying and you don't even care half the time if I'm crying or not. so why in the world are we even together? I hate counseling, but no one else cares and I really feel like this is the end for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!