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like things are so different now fuck
and every time i see you and her after school in the second band room MY HEART ACHES
and i just have to hold it in and pretend like it doesnt affect me at all but it fucking does okay
and when we make eye contact during band or percussion or when we see each other in the hallways or whenever and then we both look away after half a second that fucking hurts too okay
it takes time for me to heal you cant just drop me like that and expect me to be okay and normal
i mean im trying to put it at the back of my mind because cosection leaders is more important than a stupid infatuation i had for you
but like it still fucking hurts
and like seeing you guys today hit me harder than ever before
because shes my friend and like ouch
and now youre texting me about pencils and like i gave you a one word reply and i dont want to text you it hurts it hurts it hurts im sorry
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