Notes

Blended families face different challenges than families that have been married only one time. While they used to be referred to as "stepfamilies," many have chosen to utilize the term "blended family" as it creates a sense of unity rather than of otherness. Blended families are particularly tough on the children, and they may struggle with adjusting to the change of having a stepparent in their lives. Because of this (along with other factors), remarriages are often less stable than first-time marriages,

"There is no guarantee that every blended family will have problems- can easily be estimated by if/then statements"
"kids overall tend to do less well"
"relationships with stepparents are heavily influenced by age, commitment, money, and effort"
"relationships are stronger if stepparent is supportive of biological parent and reduces discipline tactics"
"stepmoms have harder time than stepfathers"

Stepparent/child relationships:
assumed parenting role from start- easy bonding formed, immediate and continued liking, ambivalence, immediate and continued dislike, become more or less strong- more engagement = better relationships, all parents get along simultaneously
hostile relationships between parents harm relationships between children

stepfathers- "what kind of father do I want to be?"
visualize father/child relationship

coparenting with mothers- mothers act as gatekeepers
the name game
claiming
allies with biological father
social support
more research is needed on the stepfamily process