Notes

The past few months have been extremely hard on my husband and I; waiting on a response to a decision that can change the course of our lives has been emotionally draining and various factors have made it financially difficult. As I mentioned before, I am currently in school and working towards obtaining my Doctor of Pharmacy degree. I began the 4-year program in August of 2012 and am set to graduate in May of 2016 from the University of Kansas. I have worked very hard to do well academically in order to graduate with my class and offset the high cost of tuition to qualify for scholarships. Denying the Provisional Waiver for my husband would cause me extreme hardship, emotionally, academically, financially.

While awaiting response for the provisional waiver for my husband, I have found my normally calm and focused self completely on edge. The past few months have been very hard and have made concentrating in class very difficult. I am constantly worried and anxious about the unknown our future holds, in a way that is unique than most normal families. The nights where constant worrying and stress make falling and staying asleep very difficult are now common occurrences and taking over-the-counter medication is no longer helping. The number of headaches I have had each week have increased and this in turn has made studying and paying attention in class almost impossible. This worries me even more because I could be placed on academic probation, limit my possibilities of applying for scholarships or even delay or prevent me from graduating.

Recently, my final breaking point was during one of the most difficult times of a student’s semester and has been one of the most stressful points of our marriage. It was only a few days before finals week and at the same time we were notified our application for my husband’s Provisional Waiver had been suspended and additional evidence was requested. The past couple of months had already been nerve-racking enough and had resulted in uncertainty about our future and the feeling of helplessness. Unlike most young couples, we couldn't make solid plans for our future such as buying a home or having a baby when there was the possibility that we would be separated or have to leave everything behind to move to a foreign country.

Finally, on Monday, December 15 after another sleepless night and a stressful Medicinal Chemistry final, I broke down. It was only the beginning of finals week and after months of anxiety and pounding headaches, I couldn’t handle the stress from my husband's immigration status and school anymore and had to visit a counselor at the University of Kansas. For months, the anxious feeling and worry about school, our future and finances has escalated to the point where it has become unbearable.

Visiting a counselor was a temporary fix due to the root cause of my emotional distress not improving and even worsening. I have committed myself to visiting with Dr. Barbara James for a prolonged period of time to help cope with the stress related to my husband’s immigration status, school, work, and finances. I am afraid of future consequences of a separation or move to a foreign country and for one of the first times in my young life I am worried about my mental and emotional stability. While I have always thought of myself as a happy and healthy young woman, I had never imagined how harmful this has all been to my health. I haven’t been able to sleep or eat and the debilitating headaches have affected my concentration, anxiety and mood. It’s been very hard to accept that at a young age, I may be required to seek long-term medical treatment and that my husband and I may be forced to leave everything and all our family behind in the United States.
For me, my husband is the best medicine whom provides love and support to cope with hard times and without him it would be impossible to do.

For the last few years, my main focus has been to do well in school and graduate successfully with my class in May of 2016. I am worried how this much stress and anxiety has been affecting my ability to do well in school and how it could affect my ability to continue with my class. It has been a long journey to get to where I am today, and failure to grant the waiver for my husband would result in a loss of higher education and inability to complete my degree. Without my husband in the United States with me, I would not have the emotional and financial support to complete my degree. On the other hand, if I am forced to move to Mexico with my husband, it would cause even worse extreme hardship to me academically, financially and emotionally.

Adding to my stress and worry, my husband was notified recently that the company he worked for would be closing. It has made it even more stressful because due to my demanding school schedule, I am unable to work very many hours. This has been very hard on us and has made it stressful keeping up with my bills and rent. I need my husband for emotional and financial support, fortunately, he didn’t waste any time in seeking another job although due to his illegal status it is very difficult to find a steady, well-paying job and has had to settle for temporary jobs for now. He also helps friends and relatives with side jobs in order to make our payments and provide the most financial support while I am in school. My husband is a hard-worker and has worked hard to bring the most he can to the table while I get through school. My parents have offered to help us but have made it clear that they can offer limited assistance and only for a short period of time. I know they are getting anxious and frustrated with our situation as well. I depend on my husband for the most financial support, but I am strained about our situation. If my husband’s legal status changed, he would be able to use his skills to get a good paying job and help me get through school and plan for our future.

Due to high cost of higher education, it has been necessary for me to apply for student loans and have over $15,000 in student loan debt and almost $2,000 in credit card debt. It has been difficult to keep up with credit card debt or accumulating interest on student loans, but my husband works very hard to continue to help me financially despite the circumstances. Although, it’s minimal what he brings home, it provides a lot of emotional help in knowing that it is one less thing I have to worry about and can focus on my studies. If my husband is granted legal status, he would be able to help ease the hardship on myself and minimize our debt. I need Ricardo to remain in the United States because of my financial situation but also for emotional support dealing with these problems and getting through school.