Notes

i have to break the cycle or i will continue to be sad
im so stressed about MA, i will have to start soon, i cant even look forward to the holidays
im sad cuz obviously hes straight, said hed have sex with that girl on insta, recognizes lana rhoades' tattoo, hes not into guys, he wanks to naked girls, but i wanna make out with him
one day, hell have sex and be together with a girl, and itll be so hot, hes gonna feel amazing, he wont care about where i am, him and that girl are gonna have an awesome connection, shell know what his dick looks like
i kinda cant imagine a future where im without him and hes together with someone else, but that will be the inevitable future so i dont know what to do, knowing i never ever got into his heart or his pants
daniele once said that sex isnt the amazing and special thing everyone thinks it is, tbh that sounds like something a jealous virgin in denial would say
jasons budhole, other people from school suffering forever (in the bad place), wendy demon talking attractedly to michael (would be nice if some girl would come to me and is into me), too much work to think about sex and fun (how does niggls feel, how horny is he), alicia and yannis were always together in the break (like me and niggls?), today when i talk to florine he gets quiet and kinda looks somewhere else as if exiting the conversation maybe cuz he finds it awkward or cuz hes jealous, his chest is so hot i wanna lie on top of him, his adams apple is still hot but i find my own to be kinda gross, no matter what face he makes or how hes dressed i always find him hot, think bout him today, wuntch being dead and niggls feelings about his own mortality, chuck and that other trash guy from the good place being gay with each other, wanting to have sex with another guy, did daniele subtly hint at niggls being bicurious or gay or something today when he mimicked his poses, being contempt and not wanting anything, what does he want in terms of love or what does he want out of his life to be satisfied, being seen naked by people and embarassed (him apparently not, since he was streaking, i do kinda wanna hear that story)
someone super happy like ronald knox still committed suicide, what must have happened, will people be shocked cuz i seem so happy and then they realize i was suffering so much
apparently everyone is just so much more happier in a relationship (like lorenzo), how do they all get a girl to fall for them, maybe the person the universe made for me is in fact niggls and i just HAVE to make a move first
maybe it is kinda like fate and we are meant for each other and i just have to believe and trust in hope
he said his dick is above average, i wanna see it, would he be embarassed if its small, how does he feel about his dick, does he also get post nut syndrome and feels awkward after wanking
being in an apocalypse like arisu or UDG sounds like a fun adventure
i would love a job where i can hold up a badge (like an agent, investigator, police officer, etc)