Notes

I was driving with just the littles, it had been a cloudy day and the sun was just starting to peak through the gray blah that blanketed the day. It seemed to light up through the trees and like tiny sparkles of bright light dancing and glittering on the tips of the leaves. It was thought provoking....somewhere right now theres a beautiful winding road where the sun is doing the exact same thing. You know those pictures you see of roads and sunlight and forestry , somewhere like the Carolinas , peaceful, blissful , poetic ( you know,the stuff poetry is made of) . But ...thats not where I am,this is where I am right now,5 kiddos, homeschooling, running a household,husband,kids....busy. Its where I am . Simply put. I am not driving down Bliss rd. or sitting on a front porch with just me and quiet, mountains in view. Nope, I am on my way back to a house where there is a room filled with books,computers and kids...5 of them. Teaching them,giving them a doorway to learning and watching them walk right through it! Piles of dishes and laundry awaiting me,probably a hungry dog at the door , meals to prepare, and cleaning up that mess,that same mess over and over and over ..but. this.is.where.I.am. This is it.

The other day I sat down in a chair , ( rare occurence) cup of coffee,I really liked the new place by the window where I had just recently moved it so I sat there just getting a feel for it. And now,I cant seem to stop getting a feel for it,at least thats what I keep telling everyone. But as I sat there I kinda had a moment .." Hold UP!, wait a minute,when did I become this person?? a mom of five kids a set of twins mixed in there..HOW the heck did I survive that!!!!!" "Wasn't I *just a teenager at home living under the canopy of two very responsible adults?? When did I become one of thoooose?? Time,it's the ony thing you can never really have..it's gift,that you can never own.